I am exceedingly envious of the lavish attention my coworker receives from my boss.

Let me start by saying I (37F) don’t hold any of this against my coworker, “Sarah.” She (32F) is a lovely person, a very hard worker, and does not seek out the syrupy praise she receives.

I have been an employee of my company for 2.5 years and Sarah has been there a little over a year. I only have 2 coworkers: Sarah and a new employee who started a month ago.

My coworker struggles with multiple serious illnesses that cause her to be in chronic pain. My boss, “Janet,” (47F) is never hesitant to tell everyone how Sarah is the strongest and bravest person to ever walk the Earth. This is almost a daily occurrence. Any time Sarah isn’t feeling well she gets the full “poor baby” treatment. It’s acceptable for Sarah to leave or miss work when the same is not true for others. We are expected to power through with no recognition.

I (37F) also deal with chronic pain as a result of my Ankylosing Spondylitis. (Ankylosing spondylitis is an inflammatory disease that causes your vertebrae to fuse.) I have also herniated three discs so far, the first being when I was just 17-years-old.

Here is just one example of the huge discrepancy in the way she treats me and Sarah. One Monday I came into the office and my boss asked me how my weekend was. I told her that I was down in my back and spent the weekend lying on the floor while my boyfriend was out working. Janet told me “that sounded like a nice weekend.”

Janet also just gave my day off to Sarah because she received her COVID booster 3 days prior and the poor thing was so ill. Sarah took one day off and was back at work the following day when Janet decided Sarah deserved my day off. It was just offered to Sarah by Janet. Sarah did not ask for the day off.

My boss is also obsessed with Sarah’s relationship. Sarah and her boyfriend began dating in December 2020. Every day Janet sings the praises of Sarah’s boyfriend, who is also apparently the other greatest person to walk the Earth. My boss is already talking about how Sarah’s boyfriend will propose to her and she already has her bridesmaid dress ready for the hypothetical wedding.

My boyfriend and I have been together for almost 3 and a half years. I very much want to get married to my boyfriend and I am currently playing the waiting game. Janet could care less if we get married. The only positive thing Janet has to say about my boyfriend is that he makes good sandwiches.

I know some of this stems from my own personal issues, but it makes my workplace not particularly enjoyable. I struggle with my mental health, and emotional regulation and critical self judgement are just a couple of my targets. I hate that the situation is making it difficult for me to be sympathetic to Sarah when I know this is Janet’s problem.

My options are:

1) Talk to Janet 2) Talk to Sarah 3) Find a new job 4) Radically accept the situation 5) Stay miserable

No matter what happens, I want to preserve a good relationship with all involved. Any input would be greatly appreciated.

TL; DR I am exceedingly envious of the lavish attention my coworker receives from my boss.

EDIT: My boss is well aware of all my medical conditions. More so than I would like honestly, but she has absolutely no boundaries. This is also a family owned business and Janet is effectively HR.

Submitted September 24, 2021 at 06:51AM by kat_a_tonic1983 https://ift.tt/3o1dSgd