To put a long story short, I was very excited for my best friend Kyah to meet my boyfriend (now fiance) Tom when we first started dating. When it came down to it, Kyah made a horrible impression and was incredibly rude to Tom. To the point where we actually had to leave.
I spoke with Kyah and she went on the defensive mode and didn't really apologise. She sent a message to Tom which was her attempt at an apology, however it came off as excuses and her trying to rationalise her behaviour. We hung out after everything happened and I told her I still wasn't happy, but she said things along the lines of, "I thought we were past that? I apologised. Let's go get lunch." I never brought it up again.
Tom never made an effort after that to get to know her, and vice versa. They've only ever been under the same roof 4 or 5 times and every single time they avoided each other. Occasionally Kyah will ask how my partner is going with his career, but I can tell that it's forced and she doesn't actually care.
7 years later (now) Tom and I are engaged. Kyah and I always talked about being each others maid of honors but now that it's happening... I just can't let her. It's not that she doesn't support my relationship, she just has nothing to do with it. She doesn't like Tom and Tom doesn't like her. I intentionally don't bring up the other person to them because I can't handle the tension, so how can I have a maid of honor who doesn't even like my fiance?
I guess I'm looking for advice on 2 things:
- How can I break the news that she won't be my maid of honor? And how can I prevent the fallout from destroying our friendship? We've been friends for almost 15 years.
- How can I come to terms with the fact that they'll never have anything to do with each other? These are two very important people in my life and I'd love for them to get along, but it's been 7 years and I can't see it happening.
TLDR: Best friend and fiance don't get along. I don't know how I can come to terms with it since they're both so important to me.
Submitted February 04, 2021 at 01:26AM by fianceandbffdrama https://ift.tt/3tpCuPM
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