Boyfriend (23 M) insists I (21 F) have an eating disorder and is humiliating me in public and private over it.

Hi everyone. My bf and I have been together 3.5 years. I've always been sort of a health nut and having a healthy lifestyle is incredibly important to me, especially because I was raised by sick parents. Up until recently, I did competitive dance and cheer for my university but since enrolling into grad school in a different city, I have stopped. Also, living alone and having to work more while being in a challenging program means I don't get to cook healthy food and hit the gym as much as I'd like. This makes me nervous so in order to maintain my health and weight, I've started counting my calories (and lowering my daily intake) to ensure I don't go into surplus.

My boyfriend is convinced I'm developing/have an eating disorder and has called me anorexic on multiple occasions which I've explained to him is very hurtful and insensitive. I definitely do not have an eating disorder and I keep telling him that, but his 'internet research' tells him I'm in denial and am, quote, "starving myself to death". Mind you, my bf is not a doctor and not in the healthcare field [I am] and is a phys ed. teacher so has a high energy expenditure.

We fight about this on the phone bc he's constantly checking up on me and asking me how much I've eaten. I drive down every other weekend to visit my mom and I've started dreading eating with him because he will make comments on what I'm eating, how little I'm eating, how long it's taking me to finish, how I picked the smallest salad on the menu, etc. He is an incredibly loving guy and I'm sure all of this comes from concern, but it's gotten to the point where he will say these things in front of the waiter, and our friends and families. I find it (and have told him) mean and inappropriate and he will apologize, but will stand his ground. I get my blood work done every month and I've started sending him my results to prove that I'm okay, and yet he won't stop telling me to go to therapy (which is not something I need nor have money for anyways). Is this something you would break-up with your SO over? Could this be him acting out since we no longer live together?

TL;DR: BF is convinced I need therapy for my eating disorder which I don't have. He (seemingly unknowingly) makes snide comments in public which has been the reason for every single one of our fights lately.

Submitted November 17, 2018 at 05:53PM by cool_possum https://ift.tt/2zfG8kZ