I've been dating my boyfriend for the past 3 months and we are both 22. My mom invited us to go out to do a fitness activity with her last night. He has a bit of social anxiety and was slightly nervous but still said that he would come. We were all supposed to meet up at the fitness center for 7 but occasionally my boyfriend works late so I told him if he couldn't make it to tell me ASAP. My mom paid for the tickets to the fitness class and my boyfriend was planning on meeting us there. The thing is, my boyfriend showed up 40 minutes layer the 1 hour class, and didn't even want to wait in the lobby of the center to talk to my mom when she came out. Instead he decided to wait in his car and drive off after we were done because we had something planned for our date night. My mom was really pissed off that she wasted her money, only for him to not even want to wait in the lobby to at least greet her after spending money on him (around 75 dollars). She's not upset that he came late, but the fact that he didn't even want to apologize to her face to face.
I told my bf that if he wants to wait in the parking lot to at least wait until my mom comes out and apologize to her. We saw her walk out on the way to her car but she didn't want to talk to him.
That night I tried to talk to my boyfriend about what happened, explaining why mom was pissed and why I was upset with his behavior and he got really quiet. He understood where I was coming from but kind of brushed it off. I asked for his thoughts or perspective on things because I told him communication is important and he just remained silent. We spent an hour in a parking lot not saying anything until I told him I wanted to go home. He started driving and I asked him what's going on and why he won't talk but he just ignored me and wouldn't even look at me. I felt hurt and shocked he would put up a wall so I started crying and he looked over and didn't say anything to comfort me.
We drove to another parking lot to talk and I tried to explain my feelings again and he was silent again. He didn't try to comfort me physically at all. He asked me if I was feeling better and I said no, obviously not and then he went on his phone while I continued to cry.
He finally apologized to me after a few minutes with an "I'm sorry" and explained he was silent because he didn't think his thoughts or opinions were important. I told him I wanted his perspective on things (and things in general) because I value his opinions. I asked him if anyone has ever told him his opinions weren't important and he started crying. I comforted him and he told me he loved me and went home a while later.
It feels like we never got to the root of the problem and I was shocked he was giving me the silent treatment when I was upset because usually he's very sweet. It just feels like if we can't even talk tur ugh our feelings about minor fits then how will we talk about bigger stuff.
I'm not sure what to think anymore. Advice?
tl;dr
Submitted October 27, 2018 at 05:15AM by lovelydovely96 https://ift.tt/2OTnFV9
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