My [26 F] boyfriend [27 M] of four years was acting pretty intimately with our friend [25 F] last night. The situation is a bit complex, am I overreacting?

tldr: My boyfriend and our close friend were being very affectionate (whilst drunk) last night and it's been freaking me out, but I am afraid I'm being paranoid because of some stuff that's happened to her lately.

Alright, so my boyfriend who I will call Greg and our close friend 'Jess' went to another mutual friend's party last night. Jess has been a close friend of mine for around six years now, we used to work together, but Greg and Jess are also close friends in isolation (which has never bothered me). I opted out of going to the party because I was feeling pretty sick, and Jess was always planning on crashing at our apartment because we live around the corner from where the party was taking place (and she lives further).

I was asleep, and I heard them drunkenly come home at around 4. I'm a light sleeper and heard the uber pull up and some sort of calamity, so I peered out the window and saw Greg carrying Jess out of the car in his arms. They were extremely drunk, so I don't think they noticed, but I could hear them talking and it was bothering me (because I am sick and I wanted to sleep) so I opened my door to tell them to keep it down and saw that they were sitting on the couch. She was lying on his lap and he was holding her, and he said 'I love you, don't worry, I love you' and she said it back. It made me feel strange and I decided to creep back and not interrupt them. They kept mumbling incomprehensibly (or incomprehensible to me) for about another hour and then it stopped. I assumed he'd come to bed, but he'd fallen asleep on the couch in that position with her, his hand on her head (they were both asleep). I fell asleep, and in the morning Greg was back in my bed and Jess was on the couch with a blanket.

I woke up to Greg rolling out of bed and groaning- he was incredibly hungover. I asked him how the party was, and he said there was heaps of free punch and everyone including Jess and himself went way too hard. He was feeling very, very sick and regretful. I told him about what I saw regarding him and Jess, and he explained that she was doing fine at the party and then sort of cracked and started crying. This makes sense- Jess has on and off suffered from clinical depression for as long as I've known her and, two months ago, her father passed. They were extremely close, he raised her by himself. She had been doing well, but that caused her to spiral back into deep depression which I absolutely understand- I have been worried about her. Greg said she started crying, talking about how much she misses him still and how she sometimes feels like she could go to his house or his place of work and he might still be there, that she has to constantly remind herself that he is really gone.

After this she started drinking even more heavily, which isn't normal behaviour for her. Greg was worried and warned against it but at this point, according to him, she had a pretty 'fuck it all' attitude about life. Eventually she passed out and he called an uber. He helped her into it and she regained consciousness, and she was talking to him about how she's been fantasising about suicide again (she has been suicidal in the past) and how she feels like she has nobody, is of no use to anybody, and the only person that truly loved her is dead. So, that's why he was repeating that to her on the couch according to him.

Jess was super hungover and embarrassed. She said she blacked out a lot of it but remembers that she needed to be carried. She apologised to us and said she should have known it was a bad time to get hammered head-space-wise and Greg and I reassured her that it's all okay.

I still feel... funny about it though and I wish I didn't. I think that I am prone to jealousy so I'm trying to keep a level head, but does that behaviour seem to go past 'platonic' affection regardless of the circumstances? I want to make it clear that I do care about Jess, and I am worried about her and she is an important friend of mine. I do not take her loss or grief lightly but, man, I feel kinda sick inside...

Submitted October 28, 2018 at 01:31AM by sickandfrustrated934 https://ift.tt/2OazrFB