I (24F) was violated in my sleep by my bf (28M). He is very remorseful but I am unsure if I want to give him a second chance. I still love him. What should I do?

I (24F) have been with my bf (28M) for 4.5 years. He has always been amazing with consent and making sure I was comfortable during sex. Always respected when I said I was not in the mood. If i ever even looked uncomfortable he would stop immediately. Recently though something happened that has shaken me.

On New Years after we came home from the club around 3am and we slept together. 1h or 2 later I woke up to him having sex with me as I slept. I was frozen and confused…i said nothing. I just got up and went to pee after. I asked him about it in the morning and said that I was sleeping and felt violated. He was shocked when I said I was asleep and said this is what happened:

He woke up and started cuddling me. I moved my butt in response to his touches. He touched me down there and i was wet (from earlier) and thought I was awake and down. When I got up it confirmed to him that I was awake the entire time. He was very apologetic and ashamed

I sat with it for a bit on my own and decided to break up with him. I called him last night and told him that I love him but I just cant continue our relationship. He was distraught and we were both sobbing and I went to his house to speak in person. He said that not verifying that I was awake was the worst mistake of his life and he will never forgive himself for hurting me. Insisted that it was a terrible mistake but he had no idea that I was asleep. Obviously this left me in a very difficult position because I still love him but he also hurt me…even if it was an accident.

I asked him to give me a few days to think about everything as I didn’t know what I wanted to do and needed some time. Im going to meet him at a cafe and tell him my final decision.

Im having a very hard time with this in my mind and need help. Please be gentle with me

TL;DR: My bf made a terrible mistake. Should I give him another chance or break it off for good?

Submitted January 03, 2023 at 08:37PM by recoveringtaker https://ift.tt/DVLBupq