I (34f) started dating this guy (32m) 5 months ago, it was a rocky start, broke up once but we got back together. He is very kind to me, he will do things for me, he is very caring and very thoughtful. On the paper he is the perfect boyfriend. But theres always something that i feel like, wrong..
When he broke up with me he told me that, he doesnt introduce me to his friends bec. he doesnt see himself being with me longterm, that he feels like the more he stays with me the more he will deprive me of the person i should be with, then he left. He broke my heart.
4 weeks later, he was crawling back, asking for another chance, long story short. i took him back. He told me that he went out on dates and theres this particular lady he took out 3 times, she is a lawyer, my bf said tho he knows they are both not that interested, he was showing up bec. he finds her interesting, mainly about her job. But after 3 dates they both ghosted each other and he told me, going on dates, he realized how much we have in common and how much he missed me, and how much stupid he was breaking up with me.
My boyfriend is a "big shot" some would say, he is a mechanical engineer (double degree) he works for a company where he manage big projects (coastal and marines), he looks good, takes good care of himself and he has money, ive learned that the people he dated were doctors, surgeons, those kind of women (u know what i mean) and here I am, im a ward nurse and a tad older than him.
I am far from being well off, im an immigrant, i send money back home to help my parents, i pay my own bills and live by myself. So whenever we go out, my boyfriend pays 90% of the time. whenever we go on a long weekend trip, he will pay for the plane tickets and accomodations, i will pay for dinner but within reasonable prices, my boyfriend has expensive taste so when we go to expensive restaurants, he pays for it all the time. I feel crap about it sometimes but what can i do?
My boyfriend is somewhat arrogant as well, when he met my friends, he told me he wasnt comfortable bec. it wasnt his crowd. I thought its bec. he doesnt know the people, i later realized that its bec. my friends were all low to middle class people.
The only thing i am quite proud of is that, im quite smart and im good at what i do, and people tell me all the time that I am very pretty, but being pretty will not keep a relationship. It took my boyfriend 4 months to introduced me to his 2 friends, he never posted me to his social media or even anything suggested that he is with someone and i feel like our relationship is so private.. Whenever we are out im the one who always initiate holding hands, he would sometimes but very rare. I dont know if I am just overthinking but atm im so insecure about our status and our differences in our education.
I am actually hurting bec. I am proud of myself, i moved in this country with a high school diploma, i worked so hard to be able to afford my degree, I beat my classmates that were born and raised here in exams and my peers look up to me. But why this man that I love doesnt see how hard to be where I am at today.
I honestly feel like breaking up with him but i dont want to regret anything.. as he is kind person overall, i just dont know if im the right person for him and vice versa..what do u guys think..
TLDR: I think i will never be good enough to my boyfriend and its destroying my self esteem.
Submitted October 12, 2022 at 12:15AM by Cocoona1929 https://ift.tt/nT2qjBt
No comments:
Post a Comment