I (21M) have just found out today that my friend (17F) is dating a younger girl (13F) who I also knew online.
For context: We're in a community of friends with all kinds of ages - though normally we stick to our own age groups, only mingling with younger/older people during events and the like. The younger girl and I were sorta close- while we didn't talk often, she did come to me for advice on a lot of things, in the same way I do for my younger siblings, essentially treating her like a younger sister.
The way I learned of it was, while I was speaking with the younger girl, who I'll refer to as S, about how she likes this other boy in real life, she said she'd feel guilty if she left him for the older girl, who I will call L. Confused, I asked her what she meant by "left her", and S told me she was dating L. I felt legitimately sick upon reading this, as I find that really gross and unnatural. I told a few other people about what was happening, asking for advice on what to do before we came to the conclusion that I should report her.
However, instead of going to L, and getting her side of the story- which I feel I should have done before taking action- I reported her instantly. I paid for that. The report went through and was taken seriously, and both L and S knew I did it instantly. I think it's because the person I reported it to told L I was the one who reported them.
They were PISSED. I tried to explain why to S, but she didn't want to hear a word of it. The conversation ended with her never wanting to speak to me again. Which hurts. A lot. One of my other friends also told me I was just starting shit, and I need to stop. I don't ever do that sorta thing, so that also hurt. Then, L messaged me. Telling me they weren't having sex, or sending nudes, or anything- just dating. That they were still willing to be friends with me but this has damaged our friendship exponentially.
I feel horrible. I feel like I did the wrong thing. But I don't know if I'm just hurt and being irrational, or if I genuinely did something terrible.
tl;dr: I jumped in the way of a 17 year old and 13 year old's relationship, and lost friendships over it.
Absolutely necessary context edit: I know S’s parents and knew them before knowing her. And yes, of course, I reported the relationship to them.
Submitted August 26, 2022 at 07:07PM by GezzRoll https://ift.tt/keif9rn
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