I (29M) just broke up with my girlfriend (26F) of almost 9 years after we couldn't agree to compromise.

Couple of months ago, I posted on this subreddit about how my girlfriend wanted me to come back to our country to make our bond strong. In summary, I've been living in the United States for the past 6 years and I last went back on Christmas of 2017. I just started my graduate school too.

Now, the current situation was, she was talking about getting married. I told her that I would get married with her but I need to finish my work here first. I asked her to come here so that we could be together. But she insisted on me going back and then apply a dependent visa for her. But it is not guarenteed that she will get the visa. So her narrative was, if she doesn't get the visa at the first try or even second try, I have to leave everything and go back to her and then we will apply to some other countries together. I said "no", I can't do that because I've invested a lot to secure a future here and I can't just leave. Long story short, she kept on insisting that I agree to her conditions. She even threatened that if I don't, she will think that I "used" her and move on. And that is what I gave her. I said that I'd lose more than her if I compromise and maybe she didn't expect me to just break up with her.

I know it is best for both of us. This way, I can focus on what is important right now. And she could focus on finding her happiness somewhere else. But now, she wants to have another talk. And I know, If i start talking to her, she will make me change my mind and I start promising things to her and go back. So I haven't received any of her calls or checked any of her messages. The relationship has gone toxic and I felt that if we compromise and get married, this will come and bite us in the future because we both will have so many regrets going into it.

My issue is, should I talk to her one last time? or is there a way we could compromise?

P.S. I have a hard time trusting her. She cheated once I know of and couple of times on the verge of cheating. But it was 5 years ago, shortly after I moved here. I know people change and even though I don't know of anything like that after, still trust issues are still there. Thats why I can't trust her words.

TL:DR: GF wanted me to leave everything and come and marry her, but I couldn't so broke up with her and now she wants to talk. Is it worth it?

Submitted September 06, 2021 at 12:24PM by G_Newa https://ift.tt/3jPLJ9b