My [36m] girlfriend [31F] cannot comprehend budgeting during this pandemic, and is throwing a royal fit about her birthday.

Jesus I do not know where to begin with this post. My girlfriend Liz gets very upset when I talk to her about finances. Her family background is moderately wealthy, where I was homeless for a long while and had to scrape my way up the financial ladder. We were both fired due to this ridiculous pandemic that is ravaging the entire world (she doesn’t think it’s that serious). We both signed up for unemployment and I was absolutely shitting my pants since my ideology is that this is the last money I will ever receive, and need to save it for rent, and other essentials. She acts as if unemployment is some magical candy reserve that will never run dry, and considers it her “job” to be on unemployment. Her spending habits with this unemployment has been thousands of dollars worth of jewelry, changing her already lavish lifestyle to buy tons of clothes, purses, etc. I have warned her in the past that although her family may be wealthy, any sane adult should try to budget, even if it’s just a starting budget. Having that overview of what you’re actually spending versus what will be available is what got my first apartment, my first car, and made getting out of homelessness possible. It is a critical timeline allowing you to see into the future and gives you peace of mind when financials get tight. Well, she just tells me that’s ridiculous and that unemployment will always be here, and if not, mommy and daddy can help out. This has been an ongoing struggle between us for months, especially since her parents cannot comprehend that a “homeless loser” such as myself “was ever able to make it in life, let alone date our daughter.”

I’ve set boundaries, and will defend myself regardless of what my girlfriend or her parents think. Yet, her birthday is coming up next week and she told me we are going to travel to a ski resort out of state, in Colorado (we are in Vermont) and that I will not only be paying for the trip, but everything else as well. When she asked what my budget was for her birthday dinner, I told her that I wasn’t even aware of this trip, and I am trying to complete school right now, with midterms coming up the week after her birthday. She threw the biggest adult temper tantrum I’ve ever seen, and told her that if she can’t realize the gravity of the situation ( traveling out of state putting us/others at risk, inflated financials that are NOT from steady jobs, low job recruitment due to pandemic and my previous homelessness situation that has affected my spending habits), then she can go by herself. Her rebuttal was that I don’t find her “worth” anything, and that I’m just a depressed and sad adult who can’t get over his “shitty past that was all my fault, and she shouldn’t be suffering for the lifestyle I chose” (WOW).

So I told her that this manipulative, narcissistic behavior ends now, and to act like the 31 soon to be 32 YO that she is. We haven’t talked since, and I think it’s time to cut this shit from my life. We don’t live together, and I think that this will also help in me being rid of this adult child. My question to you all is, do you think I’ve handled this correctly? Should I try to sit down with her repeatedly, even if it’s a lost cause at this point (we can never have an adult conversation, it’s always flipped to how all of her problems are due to my actions somehow)? I really appreciate you guys, and I hope you are all financially and physically safe during this shit show of a situation we are all enduring.

TL;DR: My GF isn’t financially educated, and thinks her unemployment and parents money is infinite; she threw tantrum after surprise planning a trip that will cost thousands of dollars without telling me; I said no.

EDIT: She told me she doesn’t believe my financial situation, and that she requires proof that I can’t afford it. She also said that this is to make up for the “lamest Christmas gift she’s ever received” and that my financial situation is not up to me. She also said after we break up she is still requiring me to watch her son (not my kid). Went full psycho on me, I broke up with her, we are done.

Submitted February 05, 2021 at 09:39PM by CoulombsConundrum https://ift.tt/3cUudNU