Okay everyone says that “my partner is great except for [everything else]”, but I want to make it clear that my husband and I have a great relationship and can usually solve every disagreement ever except, apparently, for this one. That’s why I’m stuck and asking on here, actually—we can apparently work out everything else except this!
I have two vices: chocolate and nice gin. My husband has a huge sweet tooth and also enjoys a cocktail. Cool. So, I’ve got two problems here:
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When I buy chocolate, I get us each separate, equal amounts of chocolate. Husband eats his very fast, in 1-2 sittings. I eat mine slowly, over a few days. When he’s run out and I still have chocolate, he pouts and whines that I won’t “share”. When I point out that he already ate his, he starts whining about how he just wants a piece and I’m being selfish. On my side of it, I get tired of paying 50/50 for groceries but only getting 20% of the treats, because he gobbles them faster than I do. And then whines even when I try to get separate treats.
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I like gin. I like a cocktail on the weekend. I get myself a £20 bottle of gin, my husband drinks half, then complains when I ask him to pay half. “Don’t buy gin then, you didn’t ask if I wanted gin, I don’t want to pay for gin.” So I say, “Don’t drink the gin then, and I’ll just pay for it and drink it myself.” Well, weekend comes around and he wants it and drinks half the bottle. Round and round we go. “Don’t buy it so I won’t drink it.” That’s what it boils down to. To me, this isn’t fair.
How do I frame this conversation to get him to either start paying half for treats or to stop mooching my treats and then complaining that I bought them?
Tl;dr Husband wants to split groceries 50/50, consumes the majority of my treat items, complains I shouldn’t buy them at all if I want him to pay half, since he can’t help consuming them when they’re there. Aka, wants to eat, doesn’t wanna pay.
Submitted June 04, 2020 at 07:22PM by boudicas_shield https://ift.tt/3gTVZKf
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