My wife (35F) and I (35M) are losing more friends than we're making and it's becoming really discouraging. What can we do?

My wife and I are both at a point in our lives where we've lost a lot more friends than we've made and it's starting to get really discouraging.

A lot of friends have just kind of naturally and organically moved on. For example, we don't have kids and a lot of our old friends did start to have them and we just slowly drifted apart and became incompatible. For another, we live in the Deep South where fanatical affiliation for some areas of politics are nearly cult-like, and some people aren't a fan of inviting slightly more moderate or comparably progressive people like us along sometimes.

I could go on with many other examples. It's not exactly that people have done anything wrong, it's just that people grow apart.

It's also so difficult and awkward to make friends at this point. Because so many people understandable have commitments in their lives now that take priority, it's like windows for making a connection with new buddies are slimmer and slimmer. It sucks, but it's understandable that commitments like careers, kids, and other things get in the way. You have to put so much work into meeting someone, and then work into making it work. And in the midst of that, all of those more important connections too often prove to be a continual barrier.

My wife and I are so discouraged by it. We have two really good friends we can always rely on, but I know it's eventually a matter of time before we inevitably drift apart as well. Maybe months, maybe years, but it'll happen. Meanwhile, no one seems to be drifting IN to our lives. Despite all of our best efforts. We've tried apps, meetups, all kinds of things. Maybe we'll have a nice visit or conversation with someone, but it inevitably becomes awkward because we don't have much in common other than being lonely.

I really don't know what to do. I feel sad about it a lot. It's a long story, but I've lost all of my side of the family. Other than my wife, her mom, and some others on her side of the family, I really have no one left. My wife's family and our two friends we do hang with a lot now make up pretty much everyone that is in my world. And I just feel that world closing in a lot because no one else is coming into it.

Anyone deal with this? What do you do about it? What do you recommend for us?

TLDR - My wife and I are quickly finding that our world is shrinking because we're losing contact with too many friends and aren't making any new friends. It's really discouraging, we've tried everything and don't know what else to do. What does everyone recommend?

Submitted November 22, 2019 at 01:36PM by HonestAside https://ift.tt/2sbwlvB