For Christmas and birthdays my boyfriend and I write each other lists and send them to each other with links on where to buy them and what size, colour, etc. This is how we have always done it and it works well for us. This year my boyfriend sent me his Christmas list and everything added up to around £300ish for the main gifts which is under the amount we usually spend on each other but it's what he wanted. I sent my boyfriend my list (my birthday is a week after Christmas so I send one list for both) and my stuff added up to under £100 as there isn't a lot I want this year.
Today my boyfriend comes downstairs really angry and says that he can't afford to buy me this stuff and if he does he has to use the vacation money he had saved up which means we can't go together. I'm really confused as my list is for both birthday and Christmas presents and he expected me to spend a lot more for him on only Christmas. He started to guilt trip me and say he had spent all his savings going out with me this month and he had spent all his pay check and all things that didn't make sense to me, we always split everything and we did nothing out of the ordinary this month. Also he gets paid a lot more than me and my Christmas and birthday are the same day every year so he knew this was coming.
I got really upset and canceled one of his Christmas presents that was £120 and now he's extra upset. I get that it was petty of me and seems childish and this may make me the asshole but I saved up a lot of money for him and the fact that he doesn't want to get me anything feels really hurtful. I spent double what I have for his Christmas on his birthday this year too and I understand that you don't give to receive but I feel there is a line where someone is just taking. He currently isn't talking to me and is really angry, I don't know if I should just re buy the present and apologise to keep the peace, I feel shitty for acting entitled but this whole situation is really upsetting me and I don't know if I'm wrong in feeling this.
tl;dr
My boyfriend expects expensive Christmas and Birthday presents from me but doesn't wan't to reciprocate.
Submitted November 29, 2019 at 05:20PM by georgialucy https://ift.tt/2OwbCLJ
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