I (31F) lost my father (59) to suicide in May. Not even 6 months later, I find out my fiance (30M) is cheating on me.

We have been a couple for 6 years, engaged for two. I am so disgusted. He even called my father to ask for my hand. We had turbulence a few years ago and I discovered he was carrying on an online relationship with a married woman he met on Minecraft. I had found emails where she declared her love for him. He apparently wanted to break it off a month before I discovered it, but she was persistent.

Two years later, we've decently repaired things. Not fully there, a lot of trust issues and paranoia. He's been acting strange as shit lately and my intuition flares up and says he's not being honest. He disappeared for 4 days and tells me he slept at a truck stop. He goes those 4 days with barely talking to me, not responding to calls and texts. Then flight a out on me for not giving him space. Just very odd behavior. He has a drinking problem, it's definitely been a barrier and I've wanted to get him some help. He at one time told me he drinks so much because he hates his life. I truly tried my best to give him a good life, adored him and his flaws. And this is what I get.

I am 99% certain this is who he is with again. She randomly started following his instagram account that he doesn't use. I also found a snapchat he had made recently, which is where they did most of their communicating beforehand.

I have also been battling depression nearly my entire life, and now even more so with the very unexpected suicide of my father.

What do I do to get a fresh start? I am packing my belongings now and have a place to stay. I will ultimately be moving out of state to work with my family. I have been wanting to meet with a grief counselor for a few months. I guess I just don't know where to even begin aside from getting out?

tl;dr Shortly after losing my father I discover my fiance is cheating. How do I start all over?

Submitted November 01, 2018 at 01:55AM by xeyesores https://ift.tt/2EUY3mf