Parents- I need feedback. I am a childless Female 25yrs old.
EDIT- first off, thank you all for your feedback. Positive or negative. Second, maybe I didn’t clarify the best. Baby mama takes care of son 90% of the time. He goes to his grandparents (BFs parents) about 20 min down the road every weekend. He probably sees his son 6 out of 30 days a month. My boyfriend attends most sports games and piano recitals . However, when he has an off day at home from work his first instinct is never to try to go get his son. He also pays for private school and after school care (not that writing a check makes a good parent bc it certainly does not) Second off, I am in therapy and have been for 7 years mainly for trauma and codependency. I acknowledge there’s an internal issue and I’m trying to work on it.
Thirdly- I did talk to him tonight and told him I will not marry you if I don’t see a dramatic change in behavior. I cannot have the guilt of plying a part of disrupting this babies life and emotional wellbeing. He isn’t happy about it but he claims he does call his son daily and talk to him but just not around me…..thought that was weird…
To start things off- when I was 9, my parents divorced. My dad was always present in my life but never emotionally supported me. He never spent time with me and I ended up having daddy issues.
My boyfriend ( 28 male) and I have been together almost 3 years. We live together and we have a healthy relationship. I think he’s saving up for a ring because he got a 2nd job. He has a precious 9 year old boy that I have grown to love. His son is never with us. He is always at my boyfriends parents house. My boyfriend goes to his games from time to time but he definitely could do more. His son and I were alone and he told me how much he misses his daddy. My boyfriend doesn’t see anything wrong with how everything is currently . Hw never initiates getting his son or asking him to come stay with us. I always suggest it.
I love my boyfriend. He says I am his #1 priority. I feel like his son should take that place. Is being a better dad something that he can change on his own? Will it happen one day? Or should I leave before he spends the money to get a ring? After my childhood I would NEVER want to jeopardize a child’s relationship with their dad . If he can change can I stay?
TL:DR: my boyfriend may be an absent dad. Should I leave him?
Submitted January 05, 2023 at 05:31PM by redvelvetoreos16 https://ift.tt/QdWuCOi
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