TLDR: my ex refuses to stop introducing his short term girlfriends to our kids, and I’m at a loss as to what to do.
2.5 years ago my husband and I got a divorce. We got married at 19 and it was a mistake. It was toxic on both our ends, full of infidelity on his part and controlling behavior on mine. I honestly regret having kids with him. We were both under the delusion that the kids would “fix the marriage” but obviously it didn’t. The divorce was probably the best thing to happen to us. The kids are in a much better place mentally and seem happier.
Anyways in October my youngest mentioned that her dad has a new girlfriend. I asked a few questions (i.e. what’s her name, is she nice, do you like her) but nothing more. I was shocked my ex husband didn’t tell me about this new spouse since he’s bringing her into the kids lives but I trusted his judgement. That was until December rolled around and our oldest (mentioned her dad has a new girlfriend. I was a bit confused, I asked what happened to the old one and she shrugged and I let it go.
I texted my ex some literature on the risks of having a non-biological adult around the kids and child abuse and he just responded with a thumbs up emoji. I also requested that he wait 6 months before introducing our kids to any spouse he has and he said he would.
I thought that was the end of it until this month. After a weekend at her dads my youngest mentioned a woman I’d never heard of. I asked her who that woman is and she went silent. I didn’t push it but later I found a note written by my oldest in my youngests room that said, ‘remember what daddy told us.’ I gently went to my oldest year old and asked her about it and after some coaxing (and some tears on her end, she’s a sensitive kid) she told us her dad has a new girlfriend but made them promise not to tell me.
I thanked her for telling me and hugged her but inside I was seething. I don’t know what to do or say. I have a sharp tongue so I know if I say anything now I’ll make things worse. Any suggestions on what to say once my temper cools?
Submitted January 10, 2023 at 06:40PM by awoogaaas https://ift.tt/7hed6oS
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