Long, very long story, so I’m going to stick to the basics so I don’t bore you: my parents got divorced when I was 6 (I’m 31 now). My siblings are older than me, and they got to live much longer with him – I don’t even remember his voice.
He left us and formed his own family. Mom asked him to stay in touch with us and pay child support. He vanished.
Recently, one of my siblings told us they were in contact with our father. They are the middle child so the divorce had a huge impact in their life. Then, the eldest is the one who took the role of “father” and helped my mom to raise us. We did good. Mom got to retire soon because we support her financially. She deserves it. Mom never told us anything bad about him. She told us it was our choice to speak or not with him.
He had three heart attacks and two heart surgeries. He left the new family (well, they are not biological children, I don’t have any more siblings) and went to live by his own. He asked the middle sibling to tell us that even though he didn’t expect any response from us, he wants to be present now, and that if he could have a time machine to reverse time and never leave my mother and us, he would. That he never really got over my mom (lmao) and that he regrets profoundly what he did to us.
My siblings and mom are in touch with him now, trying to heal a 25 year old wound. I feel nothing towards him, not hate but certainly not love: nothing. I’m happy that they are all trying to heal, but I think I need time. I can’t bring myself to talk to him. I have several issues related to my very miserable childhood and I know they began with him.
I’d like to know your point of view and what would you do if you were in place. He told my family that he understands that I don’t know him. Bare in mind that I say that he’s dead because it’s easier to explain when people ask about my father. He knows this and, apparently, respects it.
TL;DR: My dad came back after 25 years of being out of the picture and wants to reconnect after two heart surgeries.
Submitted September 02, 2022 at 08:23PM by ThatSwanGirl https://ift.tt/nK2a57g
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