TL;DR I (29F) missed out on my entire youth due to significant social anxiety. Because of this, I didn’t form many friendships in early life and missed out on many experiences. How do I find peace knowing I can never relive this huge chunk of my life?
I (29F) suffered with extreme social anxiety during my youth, to the point that I was essentially mute until high school. This had a huge impact on my friendships and prevented me from having a lot of the experiences that most cherish most in life…. Middle school friendships, sleepovers, girl chats, high school parties, and uni nights going out are things that I have missed out on and will never have the chance to experience again.
Thanks to a lot of hard work, I have overcome a huge chunk of my social anxiety to the point that most people would never guess that it is something that affects me. I have also had a significant “glow up” and get treated a lot differently now by the opposite sex.
The problem… I am now realizing just how much I lost out on, which I can never get back. I am absolutely gutted.
I thought I at least had a close relationship with my sister (25F) since we routinely have deep talks, but I recently realized that she has a much different and more “fun” relationship with her high school friends because they experienced a lot of wild and formative things together. She has told me that it’s too late for us to grow that aspect of our relationship since that is something that develops early in life. She is also getting married and is in a completely different phase of life now. This realization also shook me.
At this point, I am not sure how to move on. I feel very alone and like I don’t have anyone who truly sees me for me and loves me entirely.
How do I come to terms with
1- The idea that I may never have the sort of relationship I crave with my friends or sister and;
2- I will never be able to fully recreate the experiences I missed from my youth, which is a HUGE chunk of life I am missing
Thanks for your help 😊
Submitted July 26, 2022 at 05:45PM by KayleeW2020 https://ift.tt/Acq72Ip
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