Husband (34M) 'lied' about the end date of financial loan payout and we've been having financial issues for years

Firstly, sorry for grammar/typo mistakes. Writing this while I'm upset. My husband and I (33f) have been dealing with financial issues for a very long time. We've been married for 1 year 4 months now and have known each other for over 3 years now. Even before we started staying together, I've been paying for most of the things especially big items. I have paid the renovation of the house, all the furniture in the house, car, holidays we go on, even items like grocery shopping and dinner dates. I even paid for our honeymoon, as pathetic as it sounds. He pays for food sometimes but it's rare. Reason being is that husband earns lesser than me and has an education loan. After he pays the education loan and all utility bills, he's left with almost nothing and sometimes has had to skip his meals at work. He has tried to get better paying jobs for 2 years but it seems that his luck is really bad in this. He got laid off once in 2020 but that was not because of his fault. The dumb company expected him to work till wee hours.

He has told me since a few months ago that the last payment for his education loan is in early April 2021. Last week (end March) we went out on a dinner date and I happily asked him if he was happy that he's gonna pay the final amount and has he got any paper work done if necessary. He said he is and he has emailed the bank and is waiting for their confirmation. But somehow he looked abit sad. I tried to pursue the topic but he just brushed it off.

Today i looked at his phone (please don't judge me for this) and saw the email from the bank to him on early March 2021 saying that he still has nearly 11k outstanding.

I feel extremely hurt and betrayed. I was looking forward to the settlement of the loan and I had high hopes and expectations. I had told him months ago that with the little spare money he has after he settle his loan he can finally save and we can look forward to having a baby. He has zero savings to date. He Barely scrapes by monthly. I had on numerous occasions asked him to create a separate account for savings but he always came back saying that he has nothing after doing the payments and there's nothing left to save. We have had countless arguments over this. I had on many times transferred money into his account to help him pay off his credit card debt.

I'm not quite sure if he lied or if he was confused and really thought that it was last payment this month. This is not the first time this has happened. He initially long time ago said that the last payment is due on Feb 2021. When I asked in Jan 2021, he said that he was mistaken and it was suppose to be april 2021. I asked him many times to confirm that it's really in april and he did confidently.

I'm sick of the financial issues that we're having. I'm just overwhelmed that I still have to pay for things for another year. Because of this we've sacrificed alot. We booked holidays only to cancel last minute cos of insufficient funds. We hardly go out on dinner dates, maybe once in a month or two months. I wanted to renovate our kitchen, but would now have to hold back on this. We were thinking of having a child this year after he settles his loan. I really really was looking forward to us having a more relaxing life finally.

I'm not sure how long I can go through this and I'm currently thinking if I should give up on this relationship. It's exhausting. I have expectations too and I've sacrificed them for too long. But it's not like this is within his control also. He has broken down several times because of his bad luck in job hunting. He is a lawyer and an excellent one but he is not being paid what he should have. So confused, please advice what should I do? :/

Tl;dr : Husband (34M) 'lied' about the end date of financial loan payout and we've been having financial issues for years

Submitted April 03, 2021 at 03:46PM by Dragon_angel8 https://ift.tt/39HX6uB