My new boyfriend (24M) doesn’t feel okay with me (23F) buying a House on my own.
My boyfriend and I have been together for just over a month. Since the start of our relationship, he has known that I have been house hunting. Over the past year, I have made the decision to start my home owning journey and over the past 3 months, gotten really serious. Last night, I invited him to inspect a home with me rather excitedly. This house wasn’t a “wow factor” house in the photos so I wasn’t excited for the house, but I was excited to bring my boyfriend on a cute journey with me and start including him in my goals.
When I asked him the question, he was very depressed about the thought. When I asked him further as to why, he assumed that in a couple years, when we were serious that we would buy a home together. He said that for normal people that you live at home, rent, find someone and then buy a house. He was thinking about the future and thought that I wasn’t. Now I don’t think after a month of a relationship should I be including him in all my plans, however, I did think about this a year ago and my plan was to buy my home, live in it for at least a year and then maybe rent it and move out with my partner. Then it turns from being my own home, into an investment property while my partner and I start our lives together.
I disagree with this strongly as I don’t want to have to wait for someone to buy a home with or for me. I’m a strong women and it’s 2021. I have a stable job, now debt free and a home deposit and I’m ready to get my life sorted. He is not, he has a huge car debt, little to no savings (which is from a family medical situation, not because he is bad with his money) and he is a first year apprentice so he won’t be on decent money for another 4 years.
I quickly lost my excitement to include him and backtracked a bit. After some thought and conversation, he did say that his views were old school and that he should have been supportive. He now wants to come to this house inspection with me, but I am not excited for this anymore (reminder that I wasn’t keen on this house to start with). Should I go anyway? It’s this Saturday with Valentine’s Day being Sunday... I just don’t want any bad vibes to ruin our weekend.
I also have questions as to how other couples deal with being a single home owner, and then having a partner move in after a year or so. Do you charge them rent? Do you draw up a lease? What happens if they expect equity in the home? I am not willing to give him equity (at this point in time) because I have worked solely for this goal. I would, however, be willing to charge him rent or even say move out, rent with him, and then rent out my own home.
I just need some advice as to how to best handle this situation.
TL;DR: My boyfriend is sad that I’m buying a house without him after 1 month of our relationship.
Submitted February 10, 2021 at 01:11PM by Such_Conversation_25 https://ift.tt/2Z3FZxk
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