I (18F) have a wicked crush on my college roommate (18F)

Okay, I made a throwaway because I just have to talk about this since I can’t with anyone else I know. I (18F) have a huge crush on my college roommate (18F).

I’m a lesbian and she knows this and I’m pretty sure she’s not straight, and probably bi. We get along very well, honestly we hit it off day one which is amazing since we were randomly assigned. We are the same type of messy, don’t drive each other that crazy staying in the same few square feet that is a dorm, and generally just get along very well. Since I saw her for the first time moving in I was pretty smitten, but I didn’t want to be weird or a creep so I’ve kept it to myself, that and I’m not a blushing stammering type.

The first month of college we talked a lot and did all the college things (within corona limits) and we went from talking in our desk chairs to across in our beds to in my bed. And then she started sleeping in my bed with me, which she was kinda homesick so I figured maybe it helped to not be alone. That ended up persisting enough that we eventually just moved our beds together. Sometimes when we have some down time we lay in bed and she’ll settle into my shoulder and I’ll hold her phone and we’ll watch greys. We also joke and tease a lot, the kind of stuff like “that’s gay” or when our RA did a room inspection with the beds already together we joked about what he thought. There’s always this like undercurrent that it’s just nothing though, so idk. She’s always really supportive though, even though I’ve been going through a bunch of stuff. I’ve made some jokes trying to feel out the waters but she would always just kind of laugh them off so idk.

I guess my point here is I don’t know if I’m reading too much into things? I know if I saw someone else doing this I’d think gay but I don’t want to be a creep. She also has another friendship back at home that seems like it might be something more as well, and while I don’t want to assume I don’t want to impose either. I just don’t want to mess everything up and ruin this. I’d rather have this unknown than ruin everything by saying my feelings.

TLDR: I’m super gay for my college roommate and we kind of flirt but I’m not sure if I’m reading too much into it.

Submitted October 24, 2020 at 03:49AM by dykethrowaway1 https://ift.tt/37D1A5p