My (25f) boyfriend (22m) told me last night in plain words he does not like tattoos. I was quite upset by this. We have been together 10 months and currently live together. I have too many tattoos to count, and they aren't small. My right thigh and both calves are pretty covered, and my left shoulder has tattoos from front to back, and I also have a piece going up my side. My tattoos are very personal, some of them I wouldn't get now but I definitely don't regret them. My boyfriend says he "tolerates" them but he just isn't a tattoo person. In the past he has said that he personally doesn't want tattoos, which I really don't care about. Because I have been judged so harshly for being queer and for how I dress, I try very hard to not make assumptions about someone because of how they dress. He also doesn't like how I dress, doesn't like the blue in my hair, wants me to grow my hair long, doesn't like when I (rarely) wear makeup, doesn't like that I don't shave, doesn't like my piercings.... But I have been this way since way before I met him and I have a policy that I do not change my appearance for anyone but myself. He explained that part of what he loves about me is how confident I am in myself and that I would never change for him, and he loves me how I am now.... But also I'm confused because why would he date someone who wears/ does so many things he is not attracted to? I just feel like there is no way that he is attracted to me now, the other stuff at least isn't permanent, but my tattoos are part of me. Sometimes I feel like he is dating me just to try to turn me into a housewife or something.... Not that there is anything wrong with being a housewife, but definitely not me... Is this sustainable in the long run? He doesn't want me to get new tattoos but I'm not done getting them, some of my pieces are unfinished.... But he also said he wouldnt stop me.
TLDR: I have a lot of tattoos,piercings, short hair, wear black, hairy legs... And I won't change. My boyfriend doesn't like tattoos, piercings, body hair, the color black, or leg hair, but says he still loves me. Can this ever work?
Submitted October 23, 2020 at 08:42AM by murphjob666 https://ift.tt/3krgqzp
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