I’m a senior in college and I’m trying to take a trip out to stay with my aunt for 2.5 months. I haven’t seen her in over a year, she’s retired and lonely and I’m not sure how much time I have left with her. My grandma died when I was really young and she’s sort of filled that space. My boyfriend is very upset that I’m leaving for a while and has been telling me that I’m unreasonable for expecting him to stay with him through the whole trip. He’s suggested that I’m going on this trip because I want an ‘out’ in this relationship but I’ve stressed that if I really wanted that, I wouldn’t be trying to make this work with him. He’s also suggested taking a break but that would really mess with my head. The main reasons he says he will struggle with is the lack of intimacy. He lives by himself and I understand that a lack of human contact is tough. I’ve suggested video calls but it’s not quite the same thing. He says he doesn’t want to break up but is saying that I’m not working with him on this.
Right now, he wants me to come out and stay with him for a week while I’m out with my aunt. I think leaving to see him sort of defeats the purpose of me being out there. I don’t really want to go back and forth. We’ve only been dating for a year now and I understand that a trip this long can be difficult, but getting to spend time with my aunt is very important to me. This also could be the only time I really have left before I graduate. I’m especially frustrated with my bf because honestly, I feel like I’m not asking for much. I’ve helped him through a lot of bullshit that I think a lot of people would have struggled with. He got into a bad wreck last year early on in our relationship and I’ve been helping him out with it. This wreck has affected his health significantly and I’ve helped him with his physical therapy, emotional support, driving to places, etc. I’ve also helped him with his house and business since he’s been out. I also put in the time to drive to see him every week.
Am I fucked up over thinking like this? I just don’t understand, I feel like I’ve helped this man through so much that I feel pretty shitty that he’d breakup with me over a short trip like this, especially since it’s something important to me. He keeps saying that I’m not ‘making this work for him’ and I really don’t know what to do. I don’t feel comfortable having him out with my aunt just because it’s kind of a new relationship. The past couple of months it’s been us just arguing over this whole trip and it’s gotten pretty nasty. I admit, I did come off aggressive about the trip off the bat since his initial reaction was not one that I expected or wanted. I just feel stuck and would really like some outside advice.
TLDR; My boyfriend is pissed that I’m leaving to stay with my aunt for 2.5 months and I don’t know how to make this work for him and I
Submitted September 23, 2020 at 11:20AM by eyeglitch https://ift.tt/361aYPj
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