Me (19F) and my boyfriend (18M) are hitting a culture clash.
To start, I am a white female and my boyfriend is Indian. His parents are from India and he was born in the U.S, same as I. They seem to not catch onto the idea of “dating” and it’s turning me away from him and his family fast.
Don’t get me wrong, my boyfriend and I are best friends. Dating the last year of highschool, currently at the same college. He is the person I see every day, and we click personalities like we are glued at the hip.
When we first started dating, he had to keep it a secret. He had to lie about everything as in talking, meeting, and even having a girlfriend (he tells me that in their culture, they don’t date young)
Along with this thought of not dating young, I am not allowed to see him outside of the times his parents have set for him. I’m meaning like 12 to 5 in the afternoon every Saturday. He is not allowed to hang out with me on Sundays because his mom said it’s their “family day”. I totally respect his time, though. Some families are just like that.
I soon come to get mad at the relationship and I ended it because why have a relationship when I get to see my boyfriend once every 2 weeks when we live 5 miles from each other.
A day after the breakup, his mom wanted all three of us to meet at a cafe to try and “mend” the relationship. I felt second hand embarrassment from his own mother trying to mend his own relationship problems.
Nevertheless, I got back together and it was smooth sailing, seeing each other a tiny bit more than before. We’ve been together for 5 months short of 2 years. The problem is now happening again, but I keep putting it off in my mind. He promises me the world, and money and gifts, but I have come to the realization that this is as far as our relationship will go because of his parents blocking it.
Hell, this boy still has a bed time at 10 every night and can’t stay outside the house if it’s a smidge dark outside. He lies to his parents every time we hang out and it’s starting to make me guilty because I want to show our relationship, when all he does is lie to his parents about it.
He will not consult his parents when he wants to see me more, and when I BEG him to spend time with me, his response is that “I have immigrant parents, I can’t just go against their word” and it kills me inside because I feel like I’m filling my head with false hope to move this relationship forward.
It’s embarrassing to lower my standards to have someone simply call me during the day for 5 minutes, even if that does happen, he has to hide from his parents so they don’t know he’s talking to me. Another issue is when he talks about his parents and me, he says that they will soon grow to like you. Does this mean they hate me now? I’ve asked and he says they like me.
Should I continue on with this relationship that I’m losing the spark for just because of his cockblocking parents?
Tl;dr Indian boyfriend and white girlfriend who are struggling to find time to spend with each other because of overbearing parents
Submitted April 06, 2020 at 11:16AM by vintagedove3 https://ift.tt/34jMle6
No comments:
Post a Comment