I [23F] just got out of a toxic relationship with my boyfriend [24M] of 4 years. Everyone around me kept telling me it wasn’t right, that he’s controlling me and I’m letting him walk over me. Literally not a single one of my friends liked him. I kept denying it all. I didn’t want to believe it.
Truth is, deep down I knew I deserve to be treated better. But I couldn’t break up with him. I loved him despite all the toxic traits, the lying, the controlling. I didn’t have the strength to leave him. I was scared.
But today, I just couldn’t take it anymore. He is too controlling, I don’t get to have my own opinion anymore. So I told him I wasn’t happy, that I’m not willing to give up on things that make me happy for him anymore. He got mad and broke it off.
I should be happy. My friends are telling me I should celebrate my freedom, being single again. But I’m not. I don’t want to stay away from him. I can’t explain it. I don’t know what to do. I don’t want to stay away but I can’t get back with him either. I can’t do this to myself. No matter what choice I make, it doesn’t feel right.
TL;DR: I finally got out of a toxic relationship that i couldn’t leave, I should be happy but i’m not.
Submitted July 16, 2019 at 11:08AM by prettyandumb https://ift.tt/2XOQlmM
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