I'll preface this by saying my husband lives with mental illness. He has been medicated and living a very happy, healthy life for the past 15 years, never misses his medication and it is extremely rare he has any complications and when he does they are minor. However, before he was medicated he'd suffer from hallucinations and violent outbursts. Please don't tell me to flee my husband, I will not. We are a unit for better or worse, I know him, trust him and love him.
My husband and my closest friend who I'll call Sara have been at odds for the past few weeks due to an argument caused by her breaking a laptop he had lent her and me taking his side. Despite this, we invited Sara over for a Halloween party with our close friends we were having a few days ago as I wanted to keep the peace and get things back to normal. The night was going well until my husband overheard Sara telling a mutual friend that she had made a fair amount of money selling items online and followed her into the kitchen to privately ask her if that meant she could replace his laptop. Sara got upset that he'd ask her at the party which led to both of them raising their voices, and I intervened.
This led to a blow-up with Sara yelling at both myself and my husband, accusing him of driving a wedge between the two of us (incredibly untrue, she did that herself) and calling my husband greedy and all sorts of names. My husband told her to leave our home, and excused himself from the room to calm down and interact with our other friends. Sara and I had a brief argument where she called me a bad friend for not sticking up for her, at which point I also asked her to leave and joined everyone else.
Sara left a few minutes later and everything was great. My husband went back into the kitchen to get his mug and within minutes he started becoming increasingly agitated, sweating and dealing with visual hallucinations similar to how his mental health episodes used to manifest. We excused ourselves to our bedroom to talk and he became incredibly distressed and ordered me to leave. I did, and minutes later he tore the door off the bedroom and came downstairs screaming at everyone and throwing things. My husband is normally very strong man, and when he deals with these outbursts he becomes unnaturally strong, it took all our male friends to subdue him and calm him down.
Our friends have been incredibly understanding. They stayed with us until he regained his composure and have been in touch 24/7 since. All of them have said how incredibly out of character this was for him. Again, he has never, ever missed his medication, never drinks alcohol or takes drugs and has not had an incident like this in a very long time. The reason I suspect Sara is that she uses hallucinogenic drugs in her personal life, was the only one left unattended with his mug in the kitchen after their argument and has been radio silent since this event, she hasn't answered mutual friends either. Sara also knew of his mental illness and made several comments to me that night about how he was "crazy". I believe this was an attempt by her to get me to distrust my husband. Once again, this is incredibly out of character for him, he is not careless at all.
My husband is once again functioning as he should, but he is incredibly depressed. He has called off of work and stays in bed apologizing to me, he feels like he has personally failed as a partner and all his hard work over the years is for nothing. He keeps telling me he'd understand if I left him. How do I convince my husband I love him and believe him, and that I'm not going anywhere? It kills me to see him like this, what can I do to make him feel valued, loved and assure him that he is still every bit the man I have loved and I don't fear or resent him? How can I encourage him to go to a doctor to see if Sara did this, and how do I thank our friends for supporting my husband and I?
TL;DR strongly suspect jilted friend drugged my husband to trigger his mental illness. Husband is inconsolable and I need to know how to support him.
Edit I'm also not alone in my assumption. The vast majority of mutual friends between Sara, my husband and I share my suspicions.
Submitted November 01, 2018 at 03:28PM by Tulips746 https://ift.tt/2DgnSLP
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