Recently had a bad breakup with my [M 22] wife [F 21] because I found out that she has been catfishing me for two whole years since we first met

Me and my wife dated for a year before we got married. I felt that she was the one for me for multiple reasons and she told me that she felt the same way.

While my life was mostly happy with her, there were some key moments that would cause us to get into fights and that would be her bad habits of lying and not openly communicating with me about things. In particular, she had a really bad habit of lying about who she was (e.g., she kept claiming that she had a relative that worked in a major AAA gaming company but was never able to produce any evidence to support her claims) and she also didn’t do well in communicating with me about financial issues (before we split up, she borrowed a lot of money from me that I’m never expecting to see back at this point).

The last straw was when we went on a vacation together to Japan with my younger sister and her boyfriend. She told me well in-advance before the trip that she would be able to take care of it and that her wealthy relative from Japan would be able to help us out as well during our travels. I agreed to this, and the result is that I ended up losing $13,000+ of my own personal savings that I planned on putting towards school, and other important life essentials.

At this point, I feel justifiably cheated because before my ex-wife, I never had any relationships (beyond a single fling in high school). I have no idea what companionship feels like, and I’m starting to feel like I want it more than ever before. I’m beginning to feel more and more worthless by the day because I don’t have anyone in my life who can love me in that way. I have a supporting family and friends, but they can’t fill that void, and they’re very understanding of this. That said, I’ve been trying to keep a smile and keep my head stuck into work, reading, video games, hangouts with friends, but when I’m alone at night in my room, I can’t help but breakdown and cry about how alone I am. My bad habit of cutting has also resurfaced as a result of this, and there isn’t a day that goes by where I don’t wish that I would die of something beyond my control (like a bad car accident, for example).

I wanted to ask Reddit today if there’s anything more that I can do to make life a little less shitty for myself. I’m a private school teacher and I’ll be starting my day of teaching in a week from now. I thought my depression would go away sooner (or at least be less intense), but that things didn’t quite turn out that way. I’d appreciate any positive comments from anyone, and even someone to talk to.

On the other hand, if you want to laugh at me for this and say things like “You’re an idiot who should have seen this coming”, or something like that, don’t bother. Or do waste your time, I don’t care. I’m already a dead man walking; another negative comment won’t make any difference on my life right now.

TL;DR: My ex-wife catfished me for two years resulting in me becoming mentally damaged and $13,000+ deep in financial damage. I feel depressed and alone in that I feel hopeless that I’ll ever find a real companion in life. Is there anything that I can do to make life feel a bit less like hot garbage? I’m going to be starting my first teaching job soon and I can’t allow my depression to get in the way of teaching young kids. Positive and/or neutral comments please.

Submitted August 28, 2018 at 01:52PM by TriforceRaven99 https://ift.tt/2Ntm0AU