I (18m) hooked up with my "straight" housemate (23m) and now he's bullying me and I don't know what to do

I'm 18m and I'm a university student in the UK. I live in student accommodation and 8 of us share a flat, 5 girls and 3 boys. I get along with everyone usually. Im gay which everyone knows. It's never been an issue at uni before now.

One of my housemates "Pete" is 23m (we're in the same year at uni but he didn't start right away after school). We always got along okay but he's not someone I'd normally be friends with. He's a stereotypical rugby lad from a rich family basically. He's always seemed very straight and he can be a bit homophobic but he says it's a joke.

A few weekends ago, I went out with most of my housemates but I didn't get into the club we were going to because the doorman thought I was too drunk. I don't actually think I was that bad and I wasn't blackout or anything but I decided to just go home. Pete said he'd go with me which I found strange because he's not normally considerate. When we got back we stayed up for a bit and he ended up kissing me and wanting to have sex which was totally out of the blue as I thought he was straight. It was definitely him that started it and he was coming on quite strong but I did fully consent to it to be clear. I wish I hadn't though because it was a bad experience. I'm not very experienced and I don't usually hook up (id rather be in a relationship). I'm also not really attracted to him. I just liked him as a friend. The sex was really bad, he was too rough and at one point it hurt so much I seriously felt like passing out. He didn't hurt me on purpose, he just didn't know what he was doing and he didn't listen when I told him. It was still bad though and I regretted it. Right after he said not to tell anyone which was fine with me.

I thought we'd pretend it didn't happen but since then he's been really mean to me. He's rude and makes horrible jokes about me and then says he's just messing around. He always did this but it's 10 times worse now. He also keeps doing really hurtful "pranks". For example we each have a post tray and he keeps filling mine with leaflets about s/h and s**cide and STI clinics and things like that so it looks like i ordered them. I was cooking a frozen meal in the oven and went back to my room and he took it out of the oven and put it back in right at the end of the cooking time so when I took it out it was still fully frozen and needed around another 40 minutes (I know that doesn't sound like a big deal but I'm type 1 diabetic and meal times are important, i didn't have anything else to eat and I felt very ill). He sent a video to another housemate of him messing around with my toothbrush and putting it down the back of his jeans like he was rubbing it on his ass. I don't know if he actually did it and the other housemate told me but it's still gross. There's other stuff too. He also tried to kiss me again one other time when he was drunk but I told him to f**k off and I locked myself in my room and he didn't mention it again. It might sound dramatic but I don't feel safe in the flat anymore and I dread seeing him because he's always so rude to me.

I tried asking him why hes doing this but he said I was imagining it and I was pathetic and I needed to get over it. I think he's worried I have feelings for him but I really don't. I actually wasn't attracted to him even before all this happened and I'm definitely not now. Other people are starting to notice what he's doing and asking me why and I don't know what to say. I know he doesn't want me to tell anyone and I don't want to either. I actually feel quite ashamed that it happened. I don't know if he's being horrible because he's worried ill tell but I really won't.

I don't know what to do? Maybe he'll ease off if i give it time but I don't know. I'm quite miserable in the flat now but I don't have anywhere else to go. I don't get along with my family and I don't have much money. I don't really want to move out because I was actually happy here before this. I don't feel like I can talk to anyone because they might find out what happened. I tried talking to Pete directly but it didn't work. What do I do?

Tl, dr: I slept with my "straight" housemate and now he's bullying me and I don't know what to do.

Submitted February 25, 2023 at 02:55AM by ThrowRA54_32 https://ift.tt/xeMUKn6