Me (27m) and my gf 25f) have been together nearly 3 years. For the last couple of months I have noticed she has started talking down to me when asking me to do something or has been passive aggressive when doing things. For example if I leave any clothes on the floor for any reason, she'll immediately shout "clothes" or "move them". This could be just a pair of socks left in the bedroom while I get washed on a morning and haven't moved my stuff yet.
When I come home I'll take my coat off and occasionally leave it on the sofa next to me. If she then goes to move the cushions on the sofa to sort it out before bed and shell just put my coat on the floor. I've asked her not to and she just says I shouldn't leave it there. I don't do it often but I just think it's decent to at least ask me to move it because she's going to be doing something. She'll regularly leave things out in the kitchen but when I ask her to move them she just says she'll do it later. Whenever I point our she's getting angry at me for the same things she'll just say it's different.
This morning I made myself some toast for breakfast and wiped the counter down afterwards but I must have mussed a couple of crumbs because when my gf entered the kitchen she just shouted "clean the crumbs" I asked her not to shout and there's nothing stopping her being polite and she just said I should clean up after myself. The thing is I do clean up after myself, she just expects everything to look perfect all the time and she'll get annoyed and shout when it isn't despite leaving things out in the kitchen and not tidying them away.
I tried pointing out that the relationship seems to have become transactional and that we should be able to help each other out so if she sees something slightly out of place she can move it and just ask me to try not to leave it out in the future and I'll do the same for her so we're more like a team and she just refused. Does anyone have any advice?
tl;dr my gf is getting annoyed and shouting whenever something isn't put away despite leaving things out in the kitchen and refuses to compromise and help each other out like you should do for your partner in a relationship. Does anyone have any advice?
Submitted February 15, 2023 at 03:12AM by That-Street1539 https://ift.tt/Vd2CSJb
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