I [F25] am craving conversation with my boyfriend [M25] and I don’t know how to get it because my boyfriend keeps saying he’s bad at conversation...

Hey! So generally my boyfriend is amazing. We’ve been together for 6 months and we’ve been able to talk through the minor conflicts we’ve had but now talking is the last thing we do it seems...

He’s a quiet sort of guy. He jokes around a lot when he does talk. His mom even said she was worried he wouldn’t ever find another girlfriend cause pulling conversation out of him is like pulling teeth. When we first started dating we seemed to be able to have conversations during our dates and over text. Now though I’m concerned it’s because I started all of them.

We had our first date night in two months this past weekend and went out to dinner. When we got to the restaurant I asked him to start a conversation because I wanted to make sure I wasn’t trying to dominate and I started to notice that I started most of our deeper conversations. He laughed and asked about the weather and I said that didn’t count and asked that he pick something else. He joked again and asked about how the crops are doing this year. We aren’t farmers or live in a rural area. So I just gave up at this point and said we would revisit this. We eventually found something to talk about.

When we got back to his apartment where I was staying and I was getting ready for bed I told him that this was his second chance in a joking way and asked if he thought of anything to talk about since the last time we talked and he said he gave two options. I told him the weather and crops are not good subjects to talk with your girlfriend of six months. He sighed and asked what I wanted to talk about. I felt sort of hurt because it seemed like he just really didn’t want to talk to me and I voiced that and he got really quiet.

When I asked him what was up he just really quietly said that he just wasn’t good at conversation. After a little while of letting him be quiet I told him that he can be bad at conversation all he wants as long as he TRIES to have a conversation with me. That it was important to me because I want to know my partner as a person and not just as a romantic partner. He nodded and said he understood. I let the subject change and he cheered up and we had a great rest of the weekend.

Now it almost feels like he’s avoiding me. The past two nights after I left he barely texts me. When he’s at work it’s understandable and he texts me every 1-2 hours, but once he’s home he just starts playing video games with his roommates and I’m lucky to get a reply every 2-3 hours. I don’t know what to do about this. This morning I sent him a text saying I’m feeling a little disconnected and want to have a conversation with him about anything that isn’t crops or the weather or what we’re doing/eating and I don’t care if he has to google how to do it but I want to talk WITH him and feel like he’s invested in me. That was three hours ago and no reply.

I’m worried that I’m pushing him away and being too needy about this.

TL;DR: feeling disconnected from my boyfriend and don’t know how to fix. Help!

Submitted January 22, 2020 at 06:03AM by KitsuneExistISwear https://ift.tt/2NPY50V