My mother (44F) treats me (17F) like her therapist. How do I get her to stop this and get professional help?

My mother has been treating me like her therapist for the better part of a decade. She's had depression and been suicidal for as long as I can remember. I've listened to her drunkenly fight with my dad, both verbally and physically. I've had her come to me drunk and crying about how much she hates our dad. I've also had her drunkenly rant about how much she loved my dad (usually) whole he was away on business trips. I've talked her down from suicide multiple times. I've physically wrestled the blade out of her drunken, clmy hands. I've played mediator whenever my parents fought. I can't remenber a time before I started doing all this.

My mother, when I was a child, used to have a really bad temper. She freqently hit me, and even sometimes locked me in the closet when I was a child. She changed though. She has never laid a hand on me or my siblings (I jave a younger brother and sister). But her other behaviours have not changed at all. However, she's become an enabler. She treats her children like her friends, and I hate it. I feel like I'm the parent of my siblings, not her. She gives in to every single one of my siblings' whims. A new laptop? Sure. A new phone? There you go. You don't wanna go to school? Ok, go back to sleep then. This isn't that harmful for my sister or me because we have self-imposed limits that we follow. We're not spoiled. But my brother is. And I feel like I'm more worried about him failing his classes and wasting away my parents' money than they are. My mom doesn't want to "upset him" and my dad is never around.

My mom is also the biggest cause of my anxiety and panic. I hate it so much. I'm going off to college in a few months and I'm happy but also scared. I want to get out of here. I don't want my heart rate to increase every time I hear a slammed door or a raised voice. But I don't want my brother to take my place either. I don't want him to go through what i had to go through. I know my mom won't talk to my sister even though she's older because she someone got the impression that my sister and depressed or something, and very fragile (we're close and she's never said anything like that).

I want to talk to my mom so that she would get some professional help. Someone that isn't her 17 year old daugther or her 13 year old son. I love my mother. She's dealt a shitty hand at life; her father was murdered and her best friend sommited suicide not long after and then she lost her faith. I just want her to get better. But I don't know how to talk to her.

TL;DR - How do I convince my alcoholic, depressed and suicidal mother to stop treating her children as her therapist and get professional help?

Submitted November 20, 2019 at 10:57AM by doievenhavealife https://ift.tt/2QDje0u