We live in a student accomodation building. My boyfriend and I live in different apartments but the culture of the place is a pretty 'doors open' policy. As in if I needed to borrow a fork I could walk into another apartment without asking the occupants permission. Also, my bf/sisters and I's apartments are quite close. As in if they are laughing in their living room I can hear from my bedroom.
Now to the issue. My bf has lived here for 1.5 years, I have for 1 year and my sister just moved in this week. My bf's apartment had an opening and after interviewing 6 people they chose my sister. As a side note I requested to move into their unit in the past and my boyfriend said no.
I'm happy that she has a house but I'm uncomfortable with the interactions she now has with my boyfriend and the other occupants and how exclusive it is becoming. As soon as she moved in every conversation turned into how they're going to create the best unit ever. How they're going to go away on a trip together, cook dinner together every night etc. They've bagged on my unit aswell which is nbd but have commented on how I'm not that close with my housemates and my boyfriend even said that he has better relationships because he puts time and effort into them. The truth is just that one housemate is 10 year my senior, One is always MIA(I see him once a fortnight) etc.
I'm mainly upset that:
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My sister gets to hang out with my boyfriend in ways I've already requested and been put down about. For example I asked him a week ago if we could hang out more but when doing our everyday activities. For example cooking together, grocery shopping together etc. He basically said no and that 'we just have different interests don't worry about it'. Also they can now see eachother in the kitchen everyday, smoke together etc. I wouldn't mind if my boyfriend did this stuff with me. But he gets really angry about me showing up unannounced basically and is not that great at answering my messages.
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They are creating (I believe) exclusiveness for no reason. I don't really see a reason that we would exclude from unit activities. Sure cleaning, house meetings etc. are private but in regards to going to hang out I don't understand why I am excluded for living 15 meters away. I've known the people in that unit for longer than my sister has and would consider them my closest friends in the building. Now I can just hear them laughing and hanging out whilst I am in my empty unit.
I feel kind of trapped in this situation. I mentioned my concerns to my sister and she laughed and said 'sucked in'. She doesn't have a partner and we are quite competitive. I think she is happy about this situation. When I told my boyfriend he literally said "Well you're just going to have to get over it" and "if you had a problem you should've told me before we chose her". I don't see any of these answers helping me.
I feel like I'm going to lose the closest people in my life because of this. I feel uncomfortable, sad and excluded and I don't know what to do. Like I walked into their kitchen last night to retrieve my phone and they both stopped talking and stared at me like I had two heads as I walked in. They had ordered food and I just walked in quickly and then left.
Am I being a petty child? Is there anything I can say or do in this situation? I feel extremely anxious from this and feel like a goblin who is just interrupting everyone elses happiness with my reservations.
tldr: my sister moved in with my bf and now I feel excluded
Submitted July 01, 2019 at 03:40PM by 865422 https://ift.tt/2xny2pb
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