My boyfriend and I have been in a relationshio for 2.5 years. We have been living together since March 2018.
I don't work, and he does. I have a hard time finding a part time job because I am a full time student. So I do all of the housework.
We don't have a dishwasher, so I need to manually do all dishes. I do them every day or every other day (sometimes I leave 2-3 plates and cups overnight). However, I always clean kizchen counters.
I clean the bathroom and vacuum the whole house once a week. However maybe 3-4 days after vacuuming, he complains that "It is dirty, there are crumbs everywhere, you didn't vacuum properly!" even though right after I vacuum, he'd say it's perfectly clean. Well, we live in the house, of course it's not going to be perfectly clean days after cleaning. We eat in the libing room because the kitchen is too small. But he doesn't get it and he says "I don't vacuum well enough".
He has started compžaining about me not having washed the windows in months. I don't get who the hell washes windows every month? He says it should be done once a month.
There is an empty room that neither of us uses. I haven't cleaned it in a month (except vacuuming) because we just don't use it. I only clean it when I do deep house cleaning. But he complains because "the windows there are dirty and dust is everywhere". The thing is, I'd like to spend my time doing something actually useful instead of cleaning an abandoned room that NOBODY ever enters.
He complains about spider net in some corners. I really do my best to clean these, but it's dofficult because we don't have a spider net cleaning puff and he won't give money for it.
Also after I clean the bathroom he says it is excellent but the next day, he complains that I didn't wash it "well enough". And maybe I didn't - but all I use to clean it is a kitchen sponge and some detergent (which is for kitchen but he won't buy one for bathroom) and I spend hours rubbing the tiles but the next day there are some stupid stains (probably because of the detergent). But he says it is my fault because I don't try hard enough.
Btw I ALWAYS clean after myself and AFTER HIM, the laundry never fills up, there are never objects on the floor, I take the trash out every day, etc.
He constantly complains that the whole apartment is dirty all the time, but it really is not. He says it is disgusting and he can't live in such filth.
And when he criticizes me it is in a really mean tone. And sometimes he yells, and then I yell back, and he says how I can't accept any criticism. He always says that I need "reminding" of what to do which he says annoys him.. But he mentions my tasks every day so it does sound like reminding. And for example, I was going to clean the baathroom, and he says "You need to clean the bathroom, it is dirty" and I say "Yrs, that is what I was about to say" and he says "You are lying, you are only going to clean it because I told you to do it".
And I honestly hate doing housework, but I do it all the time anyway because I want the house to be clean.
Anyway, this is kind of driving me mad. Am I really a slob or is he overreacting?
Tl;dr - I clean my house regularly, but my boyfriend complains that it is not done well enpugh and that I always need reminding of what to do. Is he right?
Submitted June 26, 2019 at 02:45AM by atimeofbooks2389 https://ift.tt/2RDFUft
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