Long story short, I (31M) share an office (for 3 years so far) with a female coworker. We instantly became very good colleagues – we had fun together, our conversations were effortless, we occasionally even used to go for lunch together. We used to talk about our personal lives, struggles, basically we feel very comfortable around each other. I must mention that I am not romantically interested in her, for obvious reasons (she has a husband and two young kids). However, earlier this year it changed. We had a conflict about an insensitive comment she said about me in front of other people, and we did not talk with each other for one week afterwards, I must add that she never apologized, but she was able to realize how what she said hurt me.
Fast forward to present day, she is suddenly very hot and cold with me, there is a new colleague at work (also a woman) and they become very good friends (I have no problem with that). However, once they became friends and share time during breaks in the office of the new colleague, the colleague I sit with become very hot and cold with me - distant, secretive and I would say even annoyed with me, even when I treat her nicely. There are still moments when she is nice and friendly with me, even her body language tells me that she feels comfortable around me (she can appear very guarded around other people), but she stopped asking me any kind of personal questions (she stopped asking me event he basic stuff – how was my weekend atc.), even though she tells me stuff from her life, she suddenly asks me only about work-related things, but she teases me in a funny way multiple times per week. Oh, and I forgot to mention – she asks for my help in work-related things even though she can do everything on her own. I noticed that almost every time she asks for help and I stand close next to her she blushes.
**TL;DR;** The current pattern between us can be summed up like this: we talk, she opens up, she acts in a ways as if she wants my attention, then she suddenly becomes cold, behaves in a was as if she wants to push me away, and repeat.
Last week I asked her directly if she has any kind of problem with me, or if there is something that I have done unknowingly, but she answered that she has no problem with me. I must say that this dynamic is not affecting us work-wise, yet it can be weird at times on a personal level.
Basically, her behavior became very confusing for me and I don’t know why is that, because she is unwilling to communicate what is going on.
Any thoughts?
Submitted November 28, 2022 at 10:07AM by SnooRegrets5283 https://ift.tt/3Sbu9MX
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