My (27F) husband (24M) and I have been married for 2 years and some change. We have a 14 month old son together and I’m currently 6 months pregnant with our second child. When we were dating we only spent time together, he would go out with his friends once a month. We both worked from home, so our schedules were pretty flexible and we hung out almost everyday. Before we had our son, my husband was always the type to do activities with me, whether that be at home our going out. We would go out with our friends separately once a week but majority of our time was spent together (dates or just hanging out at home. Our first year of marriage was also during peak Covid times so we never really went out with friends. Sometime around mid 2021, while I was heavily pregnant with our first, my husband started to hang out with his friends a lot more than usual. I didn’t have a problem with him going out or having friends over because I knew our lives were about to change once the baby came. Also I was too tired and pregnant to go out with friends.
Now the problems began once my son was around 9 months old. I finally got into the grove of motherhood and was comfortable enough to leave my baby with family members. My husband would never want to go out with me because he got used to the idea that I didn’t want to go out with friends for so long. I would always propose going on dates but I felt like he didn’t enjoy going out with me anymore. I don’t want to get into personal details but he also stoped asking me to have sex. Here’s an example about how he chooses his friends over me; on Sunday night his best friend came over to our place without my consent. His friend (A) randomly requested for us to go see the new Wakanda Forever movie. I’m not into Marvel movies however, I really enjoyed the first instalment and wanted to watch this movie. We couldn’t find a babysitter last minute so I said let’s wait till Tuesday night so all of us could go see the movie. A said he only has Sunday and Monday off of work and doesn’t want to go another week without seeing the movie. I told both of them that I really wanted to watch it but they still left without me. I was so hurt and cried myself to sleep. Husband comes home around 3am stumbling around which woke me up. They didn’t go to the movies and ended up at a bar. I was still upset but I was also glad they didn’t see the movie without me. Same thing happened again tonight. A calls my husband and says he’s going to the movies and asked if we wanted to come. I told my husband to decline because we wouldn’t be able to find a babysitter. Without my knowledge husband told A he would meet him at the theatre. Husband started getting dressed and told me he was going to the movies. Husband said he would go to the movies tonight with A than rewatching the movie with me tomorrow night. I flipped out and called him a bunch of names, he left while I was crying. He doesn’t understand how hurtful his actions are and to leave his pregnant wife two nights in a row with our toddler while he watches a movie makes me think he doesn’t care about my feelings.
I need advice!! I don’t know what to do or how handle this issue, this isn’t the first time husband has done something like this. I don’t think he likes me anymore and he’s only with me because of the kids. He doesn’t ever plan dates for us. He also makes spontaneous plans with his friends every time he’s off of work. I ask him to have a movie night at home and somehow he always has something else planned. I’m so sick of him treating me like this. I’m second priority and his friends always come first. They come over to our place at lease 3 times a week. I’m always left stuck with the baby while they go off and paint the town red. It hurts beyond words. Husband tells me to go make plans with my friends but I’d rather spend my time with him.
Sorry if this post is long and filled with errors, I’m very emotional and it’s late
Submitted November 14, 2022 at 10:07PM by princess1024 https://ift.tt/jhcDTZU
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