Am I (40M) being selfish for not wanting my wife's (37F, married 12 yrs) sister's family to come to Thanksgiving when 2 of their kids have the flu?

There's a lot to this story but I'll keep it short. We are hosting about 30 people for Thanksgiving dinner from my wife's side and 5 of them are my wife's sister's family, who are from out of state (driving distance). She is going through a divorce and this was supposed to be a much-needed family visit for her and her kids.

She calls today, 2 days before Thanksgiving, to tell us one of her kids has been sick since Saturday with a fever and is very lethargic still, and another just started a fever yesterday. This sister is the type that generally doesn't care who comes to her house sick, so she feels like everyone else should be like her (wish I was exaggerating). She knows that most people aren't like her though, so she'll passive-aggressively say things like, "Well I guess we won't come", with the hope that we or whoever will feel bad and just go "No, it's ok, it's just a little cold" or whatever. Which is what happened in this case. Except it's the flu. (Not confirmed, but the symptoms all match.)

My wife, after mulling it over, feels like it's worth the risk since they're going through a divorce and don't have other plans now. Which is of course terrible and I feel for them, but I'm having a hard time coming up with scenarios where I'm ok being exposed to the flu for a few days. Now my wife is putting pressure on me to say it's ok to have them come because "our kids won't care and my immediate family won't care". So her idea is to keep the sick ones away from the larger group during dinner, but otherwise let them mingle with the closer family members once everyone else is gone.

I'm still extremely uneasy about it because all I can think about is our whole family of 4 being sick for a week together with the flu. And now I feel like the bad guy because I'm the primary hold out now. Do I just suck it up and say "let them come"? Any advice would be helpful. Thank you!

TL;DR: wife's sister wants to come for Thanksgiving despite 2 of her 4 kids having the flu. I may be the lone holdout at this point that hasn't approved of them coming anyway.

Submitted November 22, 2022 at 10:49PM by WillRoberts038 https://ift.tt/JTUBVf7