TL:DR: My wife is only giving me bits of information that seem innocent and the friendship has progressed to a level well beyond a normal friendship. She's broken it off but we are hardly speaking now.
Link to my original post:
https://www.reddit.com/r/relationships/comments/fpnh3j/my34m_wife_31f_has_a_new_male_best_friend
As of 2 days ago, my wife has ended their friendship.In my first post I spoke about hiw she had her hands all over him and was doing this in front me. Well, it did happen twice more. The last time she even held his hand and leaned in to kiss him on the forehead.
Ill try and just bullet point the things I want to get out.
They had also started going for 2-3 hour walks together, she insists that it's just walks.
She talks about how he's the "man version" of herself.
They have these "fights" where they will go a couple days without talking. During that time my wife is obviously upset.
He spends 20-30 hours a week with my wife, as well as my kids.
My wife has maintained that she has told him she's unavailable and married and all she wants is a "best friend" and a "cool uncle type figure" for our kids.
A few weeks back we had no kids so we we went for a walk. Down the road there's some cows, my wife loves cows. So, we walked down there.
He was "hurt" and "upset"about this because that's "their spot". She was apologetic to him and said if she knew it was going to hurt him she wouldn't of done it.
Referring to the last point, my wife took him and our kids to a place we normally go when the summer season starts, and have gone for the last 3 years. It bothered me but i said nothing because my kids enjoy it.
The other day my wife said they weren't talking and he was leaving town for a while. This is when I found out he was "hurt" by the whole cows thing.
When i asked for an explanation, she just said "Well, it all started with the cows" to which she never explained anything any further other than "You know how sometimes I can get myself in trouble being flirty" I tried to pry more information out of her but she wouldn't elaborate.
So, she went for a walk by herself as he was out of town and when she came back all she said was "I talked to him and said we can't talk anymore". I asked her to fully explain the conversation to me but she wouldn't.
I asked her "Do you have romantic feelings for him" and she just replied "I don't want him"
When I asked if he had romantic feelings for her she said "Yes" and that it was perfectly fine for me to be upset someone else "Likes her"
I again asked if she did too, and she hesitated a bit but said No.
When they had their last fight, she became very affectionate, and we slept together.
This was the most affection she's shown me in several weeks. When I hug her, it feels like im hugging a stiff board. When I kiss her, she only half gives it back. When I say I love you she sort of mumbles it back.
Since she broke things off with him we haven't spent any time together in the evening. She hardly speaks to me, will barely look at me and is stone cold on the affection front.
I'm overflowing with emotion and I don't know where to go or what to do. We have 3, kids together, age 11,8 and 5. I don't want me kids to pick up on any of this because that's not fair to them.
Thank you to whoever made it this far.
Submitted May 28, 2020 at 04:39AM by Lampburglar https://ift.tt/2ZLyblK
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