Friend group [30s] is telling me [F/32] not to confront out trans friend [M/38] who stole something from me.

Hello! I'll make this as short as possible.

My friend group is 6 people who have known each other for about 15 years now. One of our friends is transgender (I wouldn't mention it, but it's pertinent to the story). I'll call him Dave. We all love Dave to death. He transitioned years ago, and it's never been an issue... he's just Dave.

2 nights ago Dave came over to smoke and watch tv. We love the same old shows and we get together often to hang one-on-one because nobody else loves Andy Griffith like we do lol. We hung out for about 3 hours, and then he left. But when he left he was acting kind of weird. Like, he wouldn't look at me when I said "Bye!" He just kind of walked off in a rush it seemed.

So, I take a benzo medication at night for my anxiety and insomnia. I take two of them a night (this is a temporary solution, but the only one currently working). Anyway, when I went to get my pills, the bottle was full of aspirin. Like, blatant aspirin... from my bottle of aspirin in my medicine cabinet. The 2 medications look nothing alike. I spent all night tossing and turning because of this. (The lack of my medicine, and the thought that Dave took my pills).

The only person besides me, who has been in my house since I saw them last was Dave. I'll also add that Dave has had a severe drug problem in the past (you name it, he was hooked on it), but has been sober for over 4 years now.

I asked one member of our friend group what I should do or say, and he went and told all of them. They are all telling me to keep quiet because he is struggling so badly lately with depression. I understand, I'm depressed too. But they are all saying that I shouldn't confront him because it will seem transphobic. (They do not think I'm transphobic, but they are telling me that it will come off that way to Dave if I accuse him, and nobody wants to lose him in our group.)

I mean, I don't either... but I think this is stupid! I should confront him, right? My friends are making me scared he will never speak to me again. But I have a serious problem with A) the fact he stole my prescribed medication that I need (seriously, I haven't slept more than 3 hours the last 2 nights), and B) He might have relapsed.

So Reddit, should I confront Dave? I feel like I have to. But how should I? I don't want to hurt his feelings, but tbh mine are kind of hurt. Is there a way to approach him without hurting him? I know addiction is a disease, and I would never judge him for his problems - but I am judging him for stealing from me. I just want to talk to him without hurting him.

Any advice?

TL;DR: I'm 99.9% sure my friend stole my prescribed medication (one that some addicts like), but our friends are telling me to not confront him because he will think I'm transphobic and will stop being our friends. I want a way to approach him without hurting him.

Submitted November 07, 2019 at 12:33PM by friendispatrickstar https://ift.tt/2WRCh8e