My girlfriend (29) has an extreme amount of law school debt: $315,000. She didn't work any kind of law jobs for the first few years after school, but is now working as an attorney making a modest income, though nowhere near enough to justify the amount of debt she is in. She wants a high paying law job in the future and I think she'll get it, but it will probably take LOTS of hustling, time (like ten years), and luck to get there given her lack of legal experience. Even though she's smart and a hard worker, I'm doubtful she will ever pay off her debts and will die with six figure debt nailed to her tombstone.
I don't have any debt and make okay money. I also want kids and a house and the financial means to retire comfortably in the future. This relationship is looking less and less sustainable to me in the long run. But I love her (we have been together for 4 years) and I can't imagine life without her. I don't want to have a family with anyone but her. The idea of leaving her over her debt makes me so unbelievably depressed. But I also don't want a life where I'm constantly stressed out about six figures of debt and constrained by my partner's bad finances.
Do I leave her? Or do I stick it out and try to make it work? (i also x-posted this in r/personalfinance)
Update: I'm getting questions on this, so: I knew about the debt early on (couple months in), but I just didn't think it was a very big deal at the time...I thought, well she has a law degree and she's bright, she'll be able to get a high paying job and pay it off, or I just assumed that she would figure out some kind of loan forgiveness (I now know that that was maybe more optimistic than we both realized). Also, if I'm being totally honest it wasn't until the last year or so that I started thinking long term about finances or wanting kids/having a home. It was just never on my mind or something I thought that I wanted until recently.
tl;dr: should I leave my girlfriend, who I love deeply, because of her debt?
Submitted December 27, 2018 at 09:52AM by throwaway89gtygytf http://bit.ly/2Soo0gm
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