It's nearly the end of my first semester and so far it's been hell, not because of actual school but because of my mom. From my first day here she's had a need to be in contact every day throughout the whole day. She's gone so far as to call the campus police because I haven't called or texted her for a few hours...I was in class. It was so embarrassing. After the second time that happened I gave her my schedule so she'll know when I'm not able to answer my phone because I'm in class and not fucking murdered or something. That only made it worse. Now, if I don't call within a few minutes of classes ending, she spams me until I reply. She's convinced something must have happened to me because as she said, "well your class ended at 4 so why wouldn't you call then, you're not doing anything!"
She also needs to know who all my friends are, she's sent me screencaps of people I add on facebook with comments like "who is this?" or "he doesn't look like a very good influence". I'm friends with one dude who's a bit older because he worked for a few years first and she found his birth date on his profile and demanded to know why I had a 24 year old on my Facebook. According to her there's no reason he could be here except something sketchy. She goes through everyone's pics if they have public profiles. She criticizes almost every girl I add saying she hopes I have better taste in women. I've stopped telling her when I'm with anyone because she just freaks out wanting to know who they are, what we're doing, making sure I'm not getting mixed up in drugs and partying, it's endless and it's like she never believes me no matter how many times I say we're just eating or hanging out!!! My life isn't that exciting! Why does she not trust me?
If more than an hour goes by without her hearing from me she freaks out. I turned off read receipts on my phone and she thought my phone had broken. Nope, I just didn't want her knowing I'd read a message because then she'll blow up my texts til I respond and sometimes I just do not want to talk to her right then. Or am honestly busy! I'm not on my phone the whole day like her.
The most annoying part is she even needs to text me at night. I tend to go to bed around 11 and she'll say goodnight, which is fine, but if that ever varies she's hysterical. Like say i fall asleep earlier, or am up later for some reason. If I miss her goodnight call/text she's convinced I must be ignoring her. If I have any contact with her after 11 or she sees me active online somewhere else, she's convinced I'm out partying. In the beginning it was HER TEXTS waking me up then when I'd reply to calm her down she'd just panic again needing to know why I'm up so late and thinking I must be getting into trouble. A few times she's also repeatedly asked if I'm up because I'd been having sex, and did I have a girl there etc (I hadn't obviously...) So now my phone's on silent when I go to bed. That hasn't helped much of anything.
As an example of how she goes crazy, today I woke up to this barrage of messages that she'd sent between 11 and 3am
Goodnight sleep well I love you!
20 minutes later
You okay? Did you get my text?
Please answer me.
CALL ME NOW where are you???
Are you at a party? Are you drunk?? Answer your phone!!
(MY NAME)!
I see you on messenger! (idk why it showed me active, maybe because my computer was on?)
Are you with (insert names of various kids she thinks are bad for me, which is like everyone) and all those frat guys, are they drinking? GET YOURSELF BACK TO YOUR ROOM RIGHT NOW!
then she sent a pic of her crying
Please please say something I am so worried about you, you could be passed out somewhere and I'll never know, do you understand how terrifying that is to a mother?
I'm calling (school) if I don't hear from you in an hour (my name)!!!!
last text half an hour later
Can barely breathe right now, sick with worry for you. Feel like I'm going to have a heart attack. I love you so much I don't know what I'll do if you're out there in trouble, I'd never forgive myself for not being there I'm so sorry
.... Whaaaaaat the hell. Shit's usually not that bad but it's getting worse. Like I said she sent the last one around 3 am, I got up at 6 to go to the gym, when I called she answered almost instantly. Did she even sleep at all last night? Sometimes I seriously wonder if she stays up just watching her phone for texts from me and checking my social media.
Anyway then I had to talk her down from her panic attack on my way to the gym, and explain nothing happened to me I just went to bed before she said goodnight. Wouldn't you think she would just assume that though? Why does she constantly imagine the worst case? It is so fucking exhausting.
Oh and also she's obsessed with keeping track of my grades and school work. She reminds me about my own assignments. She wants to know every grade I get (she wanted this info from my professors first but they wouldn't give it), and has even read some of the same things I have to read to quiz me on them.
How do I deal with this? I'm dreading winter break with her now.
tl;dr: My mom has been losing her shit over imagining I'm getting into horrible situations while at college, needs to text me throughout the day and if I don't reply quick enough she assumes I'm in danger, she tracks everything I'm doing and I feel like she's always a second away from having a mental breakdown. I am responsible and have never given her any reason to worry so much. It is driving me insane. None of my friends parents are like this.
Submitted December 01, 2018 at 08:41AM by Important_Ganache https://ift.tt/2RsD2Bc
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