I'll try to make it brief, because it's a bit complicated.
I live in a different country from my ex and daughter. I moved out last year for work. Since there were a lot of paperwork issues, it wasn't practical for any of them to come with me, and since we are not married, it added another layer of complications.
Our home country is... not going through the best of times. it's not a warzone or anything too crazy, but it's not the best place for young people to create their lives. I jumped at the chance to set the foundation for my daughter to live somewhere better. My ex has a respectable career, but both of them are considerably dependent on my remittances for additional expenses above just surviving (school, daughter's transportation and allowance, etc.).
My ex an I have an extremely amicable relationship, to the point were I'd feel comfortable living with them here in the future, however, we are clashing on this matter and it's really frustrating. Our daughter is really going through a bad time. The fragmented family, the less than ideal overall social situation, puberty, there's a lot to choose from, and she's been having a very hard time keeping up in school, to the point of failing multiple courses on a trimester.
I hired a personal teacher for 2 sessions a week and it's helped her tremendously. She's not failing anything anymore and even though some grades should be a bit better, the difference in her attitude and performance is abysmal.
Still, she's not feeling great. Sometimes she doesn't want to eat, has bouts of depression, ignores chores, fights with her mom, and more.
At this point I'm like we NEED someone else's opinion because even though there's been progress, we're a bit stuck. So I talked to a few tele-psychologists and picked one that seemed moderate and reasonable, and referred to my ex for a chat before actually starting sessions with our daughter. And now my ex is just plain refusing to allow not only this particular therapist, but ANY therapists at all because she doesn't think our daughter needs therapy at all.
And I'm like, how can you think that a little girl in an unstable environment, starting to go through puberty, away from her dad, who was recently failing hard at school, and so much more, would not in ANY way benefit from a third party that has her mental well being in mind????
JFC, it's so frustrating. Obviously, nothing can proceed unless both parents agree, and since she's the one actually living with her AND her mom, her decision carries more weight than mine.
My ex is simply not willing to let a therapist talk to our daughter and it's killing me inside to let our daughter basically work it out on her own. AAAAAAAAAAAHHHH
I have no idea what the fuck to do. What do I do to make my ex understand that isolating each is not the best decision right now and we need AT LEAST outside opinions? What do I do?
tl;dr: I live in a different country than my ex and daughter. Daughter is going through a really hard time emotionally. Wife refuses to let her see a therapist. WHAT DO I DO?
Submitted April 05, 2022 at 06:08PM by MobileCommercial955 https://ift.tt/eQMdH18
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