My Wife has no Ambition

TL:DR: My wife is only interested in her shows, and I don’t know what to do.

My (44m) wife (41f) has no ambition, and I don’t know what to do. Background is that she is a wonderful mother to our 3 (13, 10, 8) kids. However, things have become so stagnant that I don’t know what to do.

I work full time+. She has been a SAHM since our first was born. She is also not a career woman, so her staying home was always the plan. Now that all of our kids are school age, she has time to pursue her passions. Unfortunately, it feels like her passion is to watch tv. This is at the expense of most home chores.

About 3 years ago, she decided to start watching Asian drama and comedy shows. Primarily things from Korea, but she will watch Japanese, Chinese, Taiwanese, Hong Kong, and some Indonesian shows. She loves BTS too.

Unfortunately, nothing gets done at home now. I do my own laundry because I can’t trust her to remember if I ask. I often do my own cooking because she only feels like making dinner half the time. My kids all have go to things they make when she doesn’t cook. She doesn’t clean, and there is always a mountain of laundry. I offer to help, but she won’t accept it. During the week, she just sits or lays on the couch looking at her phone. Pretty much all weekends too.

Right now, I’m upset with her because she considers all 5 of us in the living room on our own devices as quality time together. We sometimes will watch a show as a family, but half the time she is looking at her phone. I will suggest something for the weekend, but it is always a bad idea (I suggested geocaching, but she didn’t want to).

I probably could help out with the kids more, but she basically perseveres to get them to school, and then it is phone time. I have to prod her to order groceries, and sometimes that just doesn’t work out. Our private time is pretty mediocre lately.

I’m at the end of my rope lately. I often think about what I want to do when I retire, but if I bring it up, I am usually ridiculed that I need to live in the now. It is very frustrating.

Reading through this, I make her sound bad. She is a nice person, and at one point was doing an arts and crafts business (think painting art while drinking, but with crafts). That was going well before she decided to put it on pause for summer break, and then never did anything with it after that. She has an art degree, and now will sometimes draw, but mostly BTS are her favorite Korean actor. She gets very focused on her shows or drawing some of them, and gets mad at me for pointing out how much time she spends.

Help me!

Submitted October 31, 2021 at 04:59PM by machosancho1 https://ift.tt/3pUQnGG