My husband and I are both 26. We’ve been married for three years and dated for about two years before our wedding.
We were in Texas visiting family for the week. While we were in Texas we mostly stayed in separate locations. He stayed with his family and I stayed with mine.
Anyways, while we were in Texas I received a text from a friend of mine who lives in the area. She asked if we were in town. I told her yes. She then called me and told me that her sister found my husband on Tinder. That was on Wednesday night while I was staying at my dads. At first I wasn’t worried. I thought maybe it was a fake account and someone got his photos off my FB... since a lot of the photos on his Tinder profile were on my FB. I didn’t think too much about it.
The next morning my friend and I started texting about it. She sent me screen shots of his convo with her sister. Her sister and my husband matched. And she decided to play along and have a chat with him to see if he’d give anything away to prove it was him. Well he did. She asked him what he was up to... he told her he had just got done fishing. Well, he went fishing with his family that morning. So of course, In that moment I knew it was true. I kept cool and went about my day.. having my friend update me about her sister and my husbands convo.
Later that afternoon I was supposed to head over to his family’s house for a fish fry. When I got there I tried my best to act like nothing was wrong. I greeted my husband with a smile, kiss and a hug. I mingled with all his family and friends. And waited for the day to end.
When everything was over and we got into bed, I just waited. I had already made up my mind that I was going to go through his phone. I have NEVER gone through his phone in the three years of our marriage. I never even thought about it. I never had even the slightest reason to think about going through his phone.
Anyways, I waited about 30 mins to be sure he was really asleep. I snuck over to his nightstand and took his phone and my phone to the bathroom. Within 3 seconds I found his Tinder app and Snapchat (that he lied to me about having for almost five years, since the beginning of our relationship). The second I saw his Snapchat I knew this wasn’t a one time fuck up... since he had been lying to me about even having it for five years.
So, I proceeded to go through both apps. SC first. I found snap conversations with other girls from years ago. Conversations, nude photos, really nasty talk. Two or three of the conversations consisted of trying to set up a “meetup” location. I went through the Tinder app next.. which was pretty much a repeat of what I found in SC.
Of course, I took photos with my phone of everything I found on his phone. After about an hour of going through everything and sitting on the bathroom floor I realized it was time to confront him. There was no way I could wait until getting back home to North Carolina the next night.
I told him everything. I told him someone sent me info about him having a Tinder account. I told him it was one of my best friends sister. I told him I took his phone and went through it. I told him I have copies of the photos/convos from his SC and Tinder.
He admitted everything to me (as far as I know). He’s been talking to/getting nudes from girls since we were dating. So from 2014 until now. He also admitted to talking to a girl we went to high school with while we were engaged. Which is really humiliating to me since her and I are “friends” on FB and our moms are friends. And our brothers are friends. My husband and I are both from a small town if you couldn’t tell.
He deployed January-September 2017. I was sending him pictures during his deployment, of course. But at the same time I was sending him photos so were other women. I was putting my body out there and at risk(of being exposed) for him when he didn’t even need it. He was getting it from other girls. I was giving him myself even while he was thousands of miles away.
I asked him if he ever felt guilty about any of this. He said he did at first. But the guilt started to fade during his deployment. And since then it’s been non existent. I told him he would’ve eventually followed through with a meet up date. I told him he never would’ve stopped and the only reason he did is because he got caught. The only reason he’s sorry and feels guilty now is because I caught him. He keeps saying how guilty and ashamed he is. But why??? Is it only because he got found out... or is the guilt and shame real??
I want everyone to know. I want to post all the photos I have. I want to post his conversations with these women. I want his family to stop thinking he’s a god. They fucking WORSHIP him I swear. Their beloved, one and only son. They believe he’s a hero and invincible because he’s in the military. And not ONLY the military but in a special “cool guy” job. I already have some bad feelings towards his mother because of some awful shit she’s said to me. There are so many things that resurface those bad feelings - like when she shows an unhealthy amount of praise towards him. Omg I’d love to show her all this. I’d love to show his whole family.
I mentioned above that he had Snapchat for the whole five years of being together. Well, I wanted him to get a SC for so long!! I found out, not only did he lie to me about having a SC... he blocked me so I could never accidentally come across him through my contacts.
He’s lied to me the entirety of our relationship. Every photo of us that I see - I see a liar. Every photo of us I see was part of the timeline of his lies.
Thank goodness I started going to counseling a few weeks ago for some other things. Kind of perfect timing I guess. Ha. He’s told me he wants to go to counseling. He’s told me he wants to get rid of his iPhone and get a basic flip phone. He told me he’s going to tell one of his friends about everything for accountability. He seems to be truly sorry. But how??? How could he be sorry for something he’s been doing since the beginning of us??
I’m just so confused. And I have so many weird emotions. But I haven’t cried lol. In fact, I’ve laughed. Quite a bit. I think because I’m just like “what the fuck?”... lol.
Idk if there is any benefit to posting this... But I’m hoping someone who’s been through a similar situation could give me some advice. It’s so hard to believe he’ll change if this has been going on since the beginning.
tl;dr - my husband has been sexting other women since the beginning of our relationship and I finally found out three years into our marriage.
Edit : added paragraphs
Submitted July 07, 2019 at 01:30PM by Shellbell2991 https://ift.tt/32aGoyu
No comments:
Post a Comment