I (22f) have been with my boyfriend (22m) for a little over 2 years. He is super kind and easy going. Our personalities really compliment eachother. Everything has been pretty good the last two years. What has gotten us in most fights has to do with his lack of ability to take on responsibility. He has failed the community college courses 2 years in a row because of lack of effort. He periodically will get a job, but he comes from money so his mom has no problem giving handouts. Recently he has been working a construction job (for my dad) and making $$$$ a lot. I just graduated college in May and am now working in my field full time. We both relocated and moved in together.
Because of the timeline, he was making money for 2 months while I was wrapping up college and waiting to start my new job. So when it came time to get furniture and a Uhaul , etc. for our new place, he paid.
Now this was not a big deal because of the circumstances. We both communicated that soon enough when he goes back to school, I will be the bread winner and will have to help him out here and there.
His mother. God bless her but she is a NIGHTMARE. This woman basically wiped his ass and spoon fed him until he moved in with me. Even now, she will give me $200 here and there just for shits and gigs. If he has a credit card bill, she will pay it. This woman literally bought our groceries the first few weeks when we moved out. Very thoughtful but super hovering. We didnt ask her to do that.
She has since made comments to me like "you better be making him sandwiches for lunch" (she prided herself on the fact that she made her 22 year old son lunch every day??) And is so weird about ME doing BOTH of our laundry. When we visited my bf mom, my bf made a comment that i had the laundry room a mess (because we literally had been moved in for a week and i was still trying to unpack and get things settled). She scolded me for it and i was furious with my bf. I did tell him how that made me feel and that i am not a betty homemaker.
So the main issue here is basically my boyfriend has been taken care of financially and physically his entire life. And now I am in charge of trying to teach him responsibility. We get in arguments all the time now about household chores and making priorities. I am at my witts end. I dont want to make him feel bad but i dont know how to tell him that i am not his mother and he needs to grow up. Any advice?
TD;LR my boyfriend is immature because of his mother and i dont know how to teach him responsibility without being his mom
Submitted June 23, 2019 at 12:04PM by abmami22 http://bit.ly/2Ft9cbH
No comments:
Post a Comment