PhD boyfriend has no time for me

I have been with my boyfriend for only 2 months and one of the first things he‘s told me is that he prioritizes work, which I need to understand. This, I do somehow get because I know PhDs are extremely demanding. He is in his 3rd year. However, there’s more to it:

• We have went out once to a bar (very first date) and after that we have only had uni-dates meaning, lunch at the uni and walks around/in uni, unless I invite him to my place (which I have done twice).

• He is busy every weekend with work or visiting his relatives in another country.

• He told me he doesn’t like sleep-overs so he hasn’t slept over at mine yet, which to me would have been a great way to at least get some hours together to bond and also, uni is closer from my place.

• He texts me back at around 22/23:00 no matter when I text him (because he has me archived as it apparently stresses him out to have unanswered messages during work).

• He asked me out for dinner once after weeks of me insinuating that I want more romantic dates (other than uni lunches), but had to cancel that because of an actually very sad family incident (which is completely understandable) but then didn’t pick up that date promise for a few weeks after that (he has went out once for dinner with his friends during that time).

He tells me I expect too much as he told me his PhD makes him extremely busy. I just don’t know how much I‘m supposed to give up/compromise in this situation. I just know it’s making me feel not valued but I do like him very much after all…

What do you think should I accept/not accept given the circumstances?

TL;DR: PhD boyfriend has no time for me and tells me expectations are too high

Submitted April 01, 2023 at 02:09AM by Usingasthrowaway https://ift.tt/D2JPwit