Hi everyone, 21F here. I’ll try to make this as quick as possible. Here’s some background info. 2+ years ago my grandfather passed away from cancer, we were very close. He wrote a list of specific things he wanted to give me while he was in the hospital, including a lot of his clothing because I’m super into collecting vintage clothing. He passed down a bunch of stuff to me including some of his suits, watches, jewelry, coats, ect.
My boyfriend and I have been together for about 2 years, we got together shortly after my grandfather passed, he never knew him. My family knows my boyfriend and they like him a lot. Anyway this weekend my boyfriend and I went to my cousins graduation party at some fancy restaurant their family rented out. My boyfriend was rummaging through my closet a few days before the party and he complimented one of the suits that belonged to my grandfather. I told him to try it on and it fit him perfectly. So I told him he could wear it to the party so he wouldn’t have to rent a suit. I also let him borrow one of my grandpa’s watches & ties. So we go to the party, he’s wearing my grandpa’s suit, watch & tie. My grandmother pointed it out (my deceased grandfather’s wife) and said he looked very handsome, she didn’t have a problem with it at all. After this I immediately noticed my mother and sister were being standoffish towards him and I which they don’t normally do. About an hour goes by, they’re still acting weird. I finally got sick of it around dinner time so I asked my family while we were all at the table if I have done something wrong. My mother said yes I can’t believe you brought him here wearing your grandfather’s clothes. I asked her what the problem with that was and she said that it’s extremely disrespectful and she doesn’t want someone who never met him wearing his things. She also said she didn’t need to be reminded that her father isn’t alive. I apologized that it made her feel that way but I explained that my grandfather gave them to me and I can do whatever I want with them. I also said that I can choose to honor him however I’d like as he was also important to me. She stood up and said shame on both of you (to my boyfriend and I) and walked out. My sister followed. My mother & sister left the party and haven’t talked to me since. I’ve tried calling and texting, neither of them have answered. My boyfriend texted my mother how sorry he was that he offended her but she didn’t answer him either. I feel bad that I evidently hurt their feelings somehow but it just doesn’t make sense to me. I also want to resolve it because my boyfriend is feeling bad about it and obviously didn’t want to offend my family. Can anyone help me understand what they may be feeling? Or tell me if I’m wrong in any way?
TL;DR My family is upset that my boyfriend came to a party in my deceased grandfather’s suit
Submitted November 06, 2019 at 01:32PM by fuzzysoftworm https://ift.tt/2JU3hyv
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