Apologizes in advance for the long post.
A little background on us. We went to high school together but were never really friends until senior year. She was always the shy quiet type of girl and because of this I never pursed anything with her until late into high school. When we met we instantly got a long and talked pretty much every day for the entire day. This went on for months and we soon began dating. We both went to different colleges but we managed to make things work and always made time for each other no matter what. Things were great between us these past 4 years. We went on dates all the time, we took trips together, we met each others families and regularly hung out with each other families and we relied on each other emotionally. We had our ups and downs but for the most part I thought what we had was genuine and special.
This was the second girlfriend I ever had and my first girlfriend cheated on me and she was aware of this and the trust issues I had because of it. But yet I still trusted her with all my heart. She would go out in the past all the time with her friends and drink and I never second guessed her. However, about 3 weeks ago she went out drinking on a Saturday with a couple of her friends and met her sister there, who was with her boyfriend and a couple of his friends. She ended up dancing with one of her sisters boyfriends friends and then towards the end of the night they made out. We saw each other two days later and she told me she was feeling guilty about something that happened Saturday and told me she needed to tell me something. She basically lied to my face and told me some guy forced kissed her and she was "shocked" and let it happen for a little before pushing him off. At first this made me furious but once I settled down I didn't think it was something worth blowing up our entire 4 year relationship over. So I told her to never allow herself to be put in a situation like this again and that if she promised me that I might be able to move past this. However, everything she told me was a lie. Her story seemed a little suspicious to me so I ended up confronting one of her friends she went out with that night, who's also good friends with me, and asking her if my girlfriends story was true. What she told me disgusted me. She told me my girlfriend started dancing and flirting with the guy halfway through the night and then towards the end of the night they proceeded to make out 5 different times. I was so angry I texted my girlfriend and told her we needed to talk. Once we met up I told her I knew the truth and I knew what really happened that night. She proceed to still deny it at first but eventually admitted the truth. I took a couple days to think and cut off contact with her but she was constantly blowing up my phone telling me she was so sorry for what she did and that was just a stupid drunken mistake and that nothing like this has ever happened in the past. She kept saying she didn't want to hook up with him and she just was not thinking and didn't realize what she was doing was wrong at first. She would also tell me the reason she lied to me at first was because she was still in denial it all happened and she couldn't stand the thought of losing me. Its been 3 weeks since it happened and sometimes I cave and talk to her because I miss her and she keeps saying how regretful she is and that she doesn't want to lose me but I feel like everything she's been telling me is just bullshit and lies. I want to believe she wouldn't do something like this again because I still do love her and still want to be with her but I never thought she would cheat on me to begin with so I'm not sure what to think anymore. I just feel so broken and numb all the time. I keep replaying the image of her and another guy in head and its eating me alive. I feel like my core values and beliefs on life will never be the same again. I don't know how I could ever trust her or anyone again for that matter. Do you guys think I should try to fix things with her or just move on?
Side note: My girlfriend was a virgin before she met me and it took two years of us dating before she was comfortable enough to have sex with me and it took another year before she was comfortable enough to do it on a regular basis. That Friday night before she cheated on me we were having sex with each other and telling each other we loved each other and to me it was the most intimate experience I ever shared with someone. She tells me it was for her too but I just find that hard to believe considering she was able to do that and then less than 24 hours later have her tongue down another guys throat.
TL;DR: My girlfriend of 4 years went out drinking with her friends and proceeded to make out with a stranger 5 different times and then lie to me about it.
Submitted August 25, 2019 at 07:29AM by ams239 https://ift.tt/2U5z6Z7
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