So I (M34) had the talk with my girlfriend (F29) about having decided to get a vasectomy. She’s not taking it well. She feels like it is unfair and selfish of me to get one, and wants me to wait for a few years to “keep the option open, so we can decide together” instead of me getting one now. I told her that I’m not about to change my mind, as I already have two kids that I only see three days a week, and I’m not wanting to split that parenting time three ways by adding another child. The only thing I can think is that if I don’t get one now, she’s going to either try really and persuade me, or we’ll end up having an accidental pregnancy within the next few years. I know I don’t want more kids, so I want to get it done with. Is this selfish of me? She says I’m taking away her choice in the matter, but I feel like giving in to her would be giving up MY choice in the matter. As a concession, she said if I do get one, then she wants to get married within the next year, because that would make her happy. I’ve told her I’m not ready for marriage yet, as we haven’t even been dating a year and we both just got divorced prior to that. She says relationships are about compromise so it is unreasonable for me to say no to both things she wants. I really do love her, but I feel pretty certain about my decision. Any opinions or suggestions?
tl;dr I (M34) told my girlfriend (F29) that I’ve decided I’m going to get a vasectomy. She’s recently changed her mind and wants to be open to the idea of kids, but I am definitely not as I already have two older kids and do not want to start over again. She didn’t take it well. Am I being selfish or is this reasonable for me to stand my ground on?
Submitted June 29, 2021 at 04:52AM by throwaway-thisoneguy https://ift.tt/3jqBAAg
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