I moved back in with my mom 6 yrs ago to help her after my dad died. She was unemployed at the time and I needed to help her pay the bills, plus funeral and medical expenses.
Two years ago I ended up with my current bf. My mom and my boyfriend got off on the wrong foot (because he's so reserved and also he has different values than my mom). I tried to get them to like each other. But even when I invited him over for Thanksgiving, my mom tried to tell me she'd have dinner alone in her bedroom because she didn't want around him.
She ended up banning him from the house. I'm currently paying half the bills, but he's not allowed to set foot in the house, even to fix things that are broken and need fixed in the house (which he used to help with, but my mom is stuck on "I don't want him in my house" now). She insists on spending my money to pay a professional to fix things, rather than letting my boyfriend in the house.
At this point, he and I have been discussing marriage. My mom said if we get married, I'm destroying my life. She also said she doesn't even want spend holidays with us and said she wouldn't want to get to know her future grandkids. I don't know what to do. I feel like I'm forced to choose between the man I love and my mom.
My mom goes on and on about how "You've never loved or respected me, because if you did you'd listen when I tell you to leave him. He'll destroy your life. He has kids with a couple different women (against my mom's beliefs) and he has to pay all that child support. You'll have to work a full time job forever (when she thinks women should stay home)." She's also told me, "Never have kids, because they just break your heart when they turn out differently than you raised them to be." She says I never loved her because I put a man before her (according to her).
How am I supposed to handle this when I love my boyfriend and my mom? I'm at a complete loss here.
TL;DR My mom hates my boyfriend, and my mom would never even want to do holidays together or get to know her future grandkids.
Submitted June 28, 2021 at 07:02AM by Thatchick12345678 https://ift.tt/2Tfirq7
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