My (21F) dad (50M) is marrying the woman (50?F) he cheated on my mom (49F) with, and wants me to attend his wedding. What should I do?

My dad cheated on my mom multiple times with a woman (we’ll call her Jane) over the course of their marriage, and last year they finally got divorced. My dad is now marrying Jane and wants me to be present when they sign the marriage documents, as well as attend a small family gathering at his apartment to celebrate. I am morally very very against his decisions during his marriage with my mom. I have met Jane once, earlier this year, briefly.

My issue is that I don’t feel like my dad has faced any negative consequences from his cheating (he gets to marry that woman, his side of the family is civil with him and her and have not spoken out against it). He cares about me a lot, and I feel I would be able to serve some level of justice by refusing to attend any event where Jane is present, thereby giving him his “punishment”.

I’m not super close with my dad, however we do have a good relationship as of now, and I don’t know how he would react if I said all of this to him. He and I never talked about feelings or personal things when I was growing up, and we don’t do it now either. Is it worth possibly severing our relationship over this?

I also don’t know if my dad has learned from his mistakes or even acknowledges them as such. Does the very fact that he’s marrying THIS woman of all people mean he hasn’t learned his lesson? Or is it possible he knows he did something wrong but he can’t help that he’s in love? I feel like if I knew that he had owned up to his mistakes and is trying to be a better person now, I’d be more inclined to go to events where Jane is present and have more of a close relationship with my dad.

What should I do?

TL;DR: my dad wants me to be at his wedding with his mistress, and I don’t know if I want to be a part of any event that she is at, but this could cause a rift in my relationship with my dad. What should I do?

Submitted August 27, 2020 at 07:19PM by MotherIntern https://ift.tt/3jq6mpv